Puck, 1889-01-23 · page 5 of 16
Puck — January 23, 1889 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains household advice and several brief satirical sketches rather than a single political cartoon. **"The Right Man in the Right Place"** depicts a railroad office scene where a man named Jack Robinson complains about his job—likely satirizing workplace dissatisfaction or incompetent bureaucracy. **"A Shopping Incident"** shows women at what appears to be a market or shop, with a humorous caption about a purchase. **"The Worm Turns"** mocks an elevator guard's overzealous enforcement of rules against standing on the platform. The remaining items are short comic dialogues and an epitaph, all employing gentle humor about everyday social situations—domestic management, shopping, transit etiquette, and marital relations. The satire targets minor social absurdities rather than major political issues.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
PUCK. HOUSEHOLD HINTS FOR NARROW PURSES. MILE sHowiNc the poor but ambitious housewives of the country how to exercise their mar- velous finesse on boxes and barrels, on salt mackerel and beets, on ‘bright, cheap pict- ures” and calico hangings in such a fashion as to render their homes the envy of the rich but unwsthetic, we have by no means forgotten that one of the greatest comforts and one of the crowning evidences of house- wifely skill is a reliable and respectful hus- band; and we now take pleasure in showing how cheaply and still with what tasteful effect this desideratum may be achieved. Take a common rail off the fence. It need not be heavy, but should be triangular in section. ‘To one end tie a ribbon ina graceful knot; a bunch of forget-me-nots at the other end will have a neat and appropriate appearance. Now call in some of your neighbors to assist you. Do not fear a refusal: there is much more neighborly kindness in these emergen- cies than may be supposed. Rely on your neighbors. Invite them in, Ask some of the gentlemen to step forward, and place a number of them at each end of the rail. Direct them to lift on the rail, giving it a grace fal wave motion, As a mark of respect, appoint your husband master of ceremonies, and give him a seat on the rail. ‘The procession will then move off, and all will join in the triumph. ‘The local talent may be flat- tered by asking them to recite the lines: Aloft in awful state the god-like victor sate.” Guests, and especially those carrying the rail, should be instructed to pay no heed to the polite, but merely formal invitations of the host to take a rest. A coat of tar and feathers will prevent your partner from taking cold by his rapid movement through the air. A second form of the rail method is said to be fully as good as the first. Follow the directions below, and you will find that you have a genuine home luxury, and at a trifling expense. Secure your rail, a heavy one. At- tach to one end a large chain, and at- tach the chain to the leg of the husband. This should be done while he is asleep. When he awakes, retire to a little distance until his struggles are some- what moderated. It is one of the possibilities of this plan that the hus- band may be reduced in flesh and spirit, making him more ethereal. If this effect is observed, approach him at once, with kind words, and tighten the cha The chain and rail combined will keep him from visiting the dram shop; and as he will then be always at home around the evening fireside the loose end of the rail may be uti- lized to tuck into the fire, There is always a redeeming grace about the worst men ; and bad as you may think your husband, and as much worse as he really is, you may trust him not to let the rail burn’ too far, Watching the rate of progress will'keep his mind employed, and will furnish him a profitable and inexpensive divertisement for the long winter evenings. A little attention to these rules will result in turning what is usually an objectionable feature of the country household into something which is almost presentable; and we do not hesitate to say that after a woman has learned to make the transmutation, she can easily secure a position as alchemist in the Arabian Nights. SALESLADY. — C-a-a.ash! Froor Watkex.— Won't you sit down, sir, while you are waiting for your package? Williston Fish, JUSTICE KEEPS HER HAND FULL. Tue Lirrie Juoce.— On what grounds do you wish me to hold this man? Orticer Lastest, —Well, there was a murther commited, sor; and, although Oi haye me doubts about this man bein’ the criminal, it would n’t do to let him go until we catch another felly. tA M. Mrs. Marret (éronically).— You seem to be cheerful, John. Mr. Hexxessey Martet.— Dunno whether T ought to be, or not, m’ dear, Jus’ saw the new moon over both shoulders ! .A SHOPPING INCIDENT. THE RIGHT MAN IN THE RIGHT PLACE, Bicpee.— Wonder what business that man is in? They say he is deaf and dumb. ‘Carper.— Ob, that’s Jack Robinson; why, he re- ceives complaints in a railroad office. THE WORM TURNS. “Move up there!” roared the Elevated Rail- road Guard. ‘Passengers are not allowed to stand on the platform.” “We 're not standing!” gasped a suffocating victim. We 're being ‘stood up? AN EPITAPH. An Epitaph’s a‘ recommend” They give to folks, when starting To make their way in parts unknown And soothe the pang of parting. It trumpets all their virtues forth, For fear you should n't find "em; Good character to take ahead, And leave the bad behind ’em! Eva Lovett Carson, Customer — 1 wuz settin’ down, Boss. comicbooks.com