Puck — October 22, 1879 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUCK. 525 NICE YOUNG MEN. FE like to be the champions of the AA wronged and oppressed whenever it is proper and ible; and we always re- spond to the plaintive howl for help that arises from the tender citizen who can’t take care of himself. But sometimes we think that the pub- lic is rather inclined to abuse our sympathy and politeness. ‘There are some cases which, even by the utmost stretch of journalistic privilege, cannot be considered legitimate subjects for the inter- ference of the very livest and most independent journal. We have to draw the line somewhere, and we draw it here, Last week this office was honored by the visit of two young gentlemen who evidently belonged to one of the tribes of Israel—to one of the tribes unfortunately mof lost. They wore collars much too large for them—also noses similarly superfluous in quantity. They wanted to see “dot ayditor.” ‘They were politely staved off from the edi- torial presence; and were requested to state their business in writing. Thereupon, inside of three quarters of an hour. men of marked literary abilities up and presented the following communication. NY Oct 11/79 To the Editor of The Puck If the Shirt Girls M & Son... .Bdway Dont stop of yelling down the Speaking Tube the Cutters of H & W, B.... will have to tell ther mar’s about it H.K. ‘As we have said, we scarcely consider that the grievance of these young men calls for re- dress at our hands, It does call for redress, perhaps, at the hands of the ‘mars. For these young men appear to us to need such an application of the maternal palm as they were probably more familiar with at a tenderer age. No, it is not the duty of a newspaper to cor- rect a couple of supernaturally ignorant little cads who imagine that their petty personal con- cerns are of interest to the public at large. But it is the duty of their parents or guardians to punish, and right soundly, too, the vulgar meanness that seeks thus to annoy a parcel of foolish, indiscreet shop-girls, The miserable position of the young woman who works for her bread. ought to command a certain respect. No one with ashade of manliness would try to bring such‘women into public disgrace—per- haps get them into trouble with the people to whom they owe their bread and butter. Pro- bably “H. K.” and his companion would think it a very fine thing to induce some “ flash” sheet to print a reference to the foolish behav- ior of the seamstresses of the house they wish us to mention, and thereby throw them into the hands of a horde of scamps always on the look- out for such poor, foolish girls. If these boys have not parents to chastise them, we trust their employers will give them the lesson they need. The name of the firm that enjoys the services of these ornaments to mercantile life is Herman & Wolf, 406 Broad- way. THE THEATRES. “French Flats” was produced last night at the Union Square THEATRE, too late for no- tice this week. at Koster & Biat’s Concerts, If you don't believe us, go and judge for yourself, The Firtn Avenve Tueatre is still the home of opéra-bouffe, and Angéle, Paola-Marié and Capoul keep house. “‘ Le Petit Faust ” is the present lively racket. One can always hear good and lively music |. Miss Nard Almayne showed last Saturday what she knew about Ophc/ia to the Hamlet of Mr. Bandmann, “Enchantment” enchants as usual at Nip- Lo's with its excellent ballet and all sorts of other things. Sir Joseph Tooker is always on deck, and is as useful at his post as he is ornam- ental, The Stanparp is now giving ‘“H. M.S. Pinafore" by W. S. Gilbert and A. Sullivan, It is an amusing piece and contains many bright and catching airs which will doubtless become popular. Me Hobbies,” “Hobbies,” “ Hobbies” fill or rather fills Haverty's TieaTRE nightly; and why shouldn't it? for Goodwin is decidedly funny and Weathersby can make a piece of this kind go if anybody can. Mr. Daty's superb theatre was filled on Sat- urday evening last with a fashionable audience to sce two of Molidre’s comedies, anglicised and adapted into modern unity by Mr. Bronson Howard under the name of “ Wives.” Wes hall have more to say of this anon. “Dundreary” has given place to “ David Garrick” at the Park, and we don’t think Mr. Abbey and Mr. Sothern have much cause to complain of the public patronage, except on the ground of the house not being constructed of India-rubber, At Cuickerinc Hatt Mr, Joseffy, the latest invention in piano players, is astonishil natives, and naturalized and unnatur: zens who are fond of music, Mr. Joseffy is a sort of von Biilow, Rubenstein, Liszt, Essipoff, rolled into one, with all their best points and few of their objectionable ones, Anybody who has not visited the AMERICAN InstiruTe Fair, we beg pardon—Exhibition, does not deserve well of his or her country. It betrays a lack of appreciation of many use- ful and ornamental things, which is much to be deplored. The sin of omission is, however,. easily remedied by losing no time in getting up there by Mr. Cyrus Field’s beastly railroad, Answers floy the Anrious. Hasgxtine.— Call her in, out of the rain. WALDRON.—Permit us to suggest to you that it is cus- tomary, in journalistic circles, to send the point of your joke along with the joke itself. We are desirous of being just as accommodating as it is possible to be; but we really can't wait till the apex, as it were, of your contri- bution arrives by canal. H. J. B., Jr.—You want to know “ what qualifications are necessary to become a successful playwright 2” Well, that depends. If you seriously intend embarking in the American Dramatist business, we should say that a small appetite and a sanguine disposition would be about the best capital to start in on, Samurt Jackson.—We don’t want to flatter you; but if you could conveniently have yourself stuffed and framed, we should take great pleasure in hanging you up in our office. The man who could send us an ice-cream poem on the seventeenth of October deserves to be immortalized for cold cheek, if for nothing else, Goupen Brut.—The leaves are dropping from the bare and lifeless branches, that is a solemn fact. But we see no reason why we should attempt to interfere with their dropping by inserting your poem. Let the leaves drop, young man; and, while you are about it, suppose you follow their example, and gravitate on yourself, G, A. M., B St., Washington.—Do us the favor to turn to our'second page, first column, nonpareil para- graph, relating to our utter inability to return rejected communications, Not even stamps will woo us to break a rule which we have been obliged to adopt for our own protection, And you haven't even sought to woo us with stamps, FITZNOODLE IN AMERICA. No, CX. HE BECOMES EN- GAGED, Ya-as, I aw have done it at last. I am engaged to Miss Marguerwite. I pwoposed and have been accept- ed. 5 jack says lama ieee fellaw, and ‘pon my soul I don’t think it’s a very bad shot aftah all, faw Miss Marguerwite is a aw sweet gyurl, and fah superwiah to the averwage wun of Amerwican female cweatures, 1 don’t know pwecis: ly when the matwimo- nial cerwemony will take place, but neithah Miss Marguerwite nor myself is in a particulah hurwy, although I can’t say I have a pwedilec- tion faw long engagements; they are not verwy good form, I suppose many fellaws are extwemely anx- ious to know undah what circumstances I we- solved—aw scwewed up my courwage to p-p-pop the question, It was a verwy simple mattah, Faw a long perwiod people have thought that I was wathah attentive im the dirwection of Miss Marguerwite, and they were apparwently not so verwy fah out. I aw followed in her twain pwetty well to all the wesorts and othah places she gwaced by her pwesence durwing the summah, and when she had weturned and comfortably settled in town, 1 thought that my opportunity had ar- wived. ‘The memorwable interwogation was pwo- pounded by me aftah dionah last evening. I found Miss Marguerwite sitting in the dwawing-woom, weading some kind of literwa- ture. She wasn’t surpwised to see me, She nevah is, I was wejoiced to he-ah fwom her that her young cub of a bwothah—my horwah —had gone out of town for severwal weeks, so that there would be no interwuption fwom him, Aftah we had exchanged the usual gweetings, I thought I had bettah speak and get wid of the mattah at once. “Miss Marguerwite,” said, “I aw nevah gave you cwedit for being blind, so I suppose you must have seen that I have aw considerwable admirwation faw you. I have, ‘pon my soul.” Miss Marguerwite smiled and bowed. “(Aw I merely wished to observe that, if there are no insuperwable objections, I should wathah think it a pwivilege to be allowed to become your aw husband.” Miss Marguerwite said nothing. my addwess, “Aw many people say I am a fool, Per- whaps I am, but I have everwy weason to be- lieve that there are a large numbah of gweatah fools in existence, which is weassurwing if twue.”” Miss Marguerwite was still silent. “Aw I should verwy much like to have your weply, if agwecable or otherwise.” Miss Marguerwite’s answer was favorwable, and she weally didn't seem offended aw, ani she actually allowed me to impwint a kiss on her forewhead. I don’t think I shall descwibe any more of these engagement pwoceedings faw the pwe- sent aw, I wesumed Numbers 1, 8, 24, 84, 88, 48, 44, 48, 50, 62, 68, 78, 84 and 88 of Puck will be bought at this office, No. 21 & 23 Warren St, at LO CENTS per copy; and Numbers 9, 14, 26, 58, 6G and 58 at 2G CENTS per copy. sey In sending copies by mail please roll lengthwise. | comicbooks.com