Puck — August 27, 1879 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

894 PUCK. A SIMPLE, GAME, T Coney Island, years ago, ere swell hotels were ‘When every one who thither went was bathed sad clameenen ape becred. ae I spent a quiet afternoon, one day, upon the ly ‘qd in a somewhat novel game somehow took a hand. [think I must have e bora asleep, for, when I tured Two strangers sat close by my side upon the sandy ‘And, while the waves broke into foam that stole upon Those strangers played the iplest game I ever sawbe- aaa ‘One had three cards.within bis hand—a queen,'a king, |. * oa jack: He shuffled them gute foerenatly, bot did it awfol'slack; ‘Then laid them flat upon his knee—the simplest game eer seen— ‘And from their backs the other tried to tell which was jas the queen. ‘That guesser was a perfect fool, without one grain of wit, For ev'ry time he wees guess, he made a miss of it; Somehow he failed most clumsily to hit the proper place ‘Where was the queen, though it was plain as the nose ‘upon one’s face. I grew impatient, almost mad, to see him bungle so, ‘And Ares Bints and nudges, as «fellow will, you now, Till unto me the dealer turned, and asked if I would guess: Tt seemed a very simple game, and so I answered: Yes He threw the cards so carelessly that every move was seen: I'l bet a dollar bill,” he said, ‘you can't tell which is yueen.”” «Tl take the bet,” I quickly cried,“ The queen is on the right.” * ; Iwon. He said he did not know I was so keenof sight. He shuffled up the cards again, and showed them reck- lessly. This time you cannot guess,” he said; “on that Ill risk a V." I took his bet, for, when he threw, most plainly I had “ sect Where fell the card; but, when turned o'er, alas, "twas not the queen! ‘Twas such a very.simple game, I tried my luck once more; » The thing was just as’plain,to,me as it had been before. lew tienen ‘drop in a certain spot; T put my fin ‘but there's where she was. I guessed and ‘uiled,and guessed and failed, and guessed Each time he dealt it simpler grew, and seemed to me more plain. at length I could no longer pays ‘And then, without a single word, those strangers slipped away. ‘Now I don’t know those three-card men, nor know I “whence they came, Nor how a man can lose his stamps at such a simple game. It is averysimple game, yet it cleaned my purse outright; It is a very simple game, yet I walked home that night. FITZNOODLE IN AMERICA. No, CII. SOME SUMMER HOTELS, . Ya-as, at the we- uest of some.of the fellaws who “wejoice im calling. themselves my. fwiends, 1 have been ing about ‘among a var- wlety “of .Summah wesorts, all maw or, less celebwated: faw the salubwity of their climate and othah attwactions. : Aw, I shall not wefer to these places by their extwaordinarwy names, oL weally.can’t wemembah them;.but I feel pwetty certain that the averwage weadah will wecognize the wurwal spots fwom my bwilliant descwiption. Amerwicans, as a mattah of course, and in common with othah wespectable people who make some pwetensions to civilization, like to get a bweath of fwesh air in the countwy when the weathah is inclined to be pleasant. - At home, ye know, it’s the pwopah thing to twavel abwoad, or to go to one’s place in the interwiah aftah the season. But the Eurwopean pwactice is far pwefer- wable#o the Amerwican system. Brwicans wush away to one of the places tox The hotel is generwally n -like stwucture, weserbling On an inferwiah scale. A mountain, a wivah, or othah watah arwangement, is fwe- uently in close pwoximity to the b-b-barn, but the wemaining portions of the immediate vici- nity—I mean the gwounds—are wemarkably wough and waw, and appe-ah as if they had been manufacturwed in a verwy pwimitive perwiod—perwhaps soon aftah the cweation of the worwld, All the countwy and woads in the immediate neighborwhood are exceedingly wetched—so verwy differwent fwom much- fwequented pleasure wesorts in Eurwope, espe- cially Gweat Bwitain. A whole wegiment of Amerwicans and their families take up their wesidence in this barn- carwavansarwy and appe-ah to me to lead a wemarkably odd sort of life. They wise everwy morning, and faw two or thwee hours there is an extensive stweam of bweakfastahs who cwowd the tables in the wefectorwy and wevel in beef- steak, wolls, many kinds of bwead, and a varwiety of othah edible and dwinkable ar- wangements. A similah exhibition takes place early in the aftahnoon at a meal called dinnah, if it is at'all entitled to that name at such a horwibly early hour of the day. Anothah feeding- match, called suppah, comes off about sunset. So much faw the eating and dwinking in chorwus. * Aftah bweakfast, I believe, there isa wegulah woll-call. to find out if anybody is lost, stolen, or sev ren The temporwary hotel wesidents then “ bweak off” and stwoll about the verwan- dahs, and smoke and wead and west. Some of them go out faw a dwive in borwowed vehicles dwawn by horwible scwews fwom a liverwy stable, and make desperwate efforts to discovah a wespectable woad to twavel ovah, The old and and young women gossip and pwetend to em- broidah, and amuse themselves by enterwing into conversation with verwy young fellaws, chiefly Amerwican college undahgwaduates, There are generwally twenty-thwee female cweatures to one of the woughah sex, and he is mostly a aw boy—but the enterpwising gyurls make a pwodigious fuss of him, and arwange faw an honorwable and equitable division of his attentions to twot them out in a quadrille or waltz or some othah dance, or play at chil- dren’s games in a ball-woom, to the accompani- ment-of two or thwee bwoken-down instwu- ments discoursing dyspeptic music. It seems wathah an arbitwary wule, but Iam cwedibly informed it is always stwictly carwied out—but weally no lady is permitted to: entah any of these hotels unless she makes an affidavit that she can at least we-ah two new dwesses daily durwing the perwiod of their sojourn, and Jack says there are few instances of perjurwy on ‘wecord. And this is the mannah in which the ma- jorwity of Amerwican people bweathe the fwesh air in summah aw. The Modern Argo, published at Quincy, Ill., is a most acceptable exchange, Its articles and paragraphs are far superior to the average western newspaper, and its get-up is exceed- ingly attractive, ‘POLICE RECORD For THE WEEK ENDING AUGUST 23RD, 1879, “The Finest in the World.” Answers for the Anrious. Hasetive.—Sorry her lot. PATERFAMILIAS.—Don’t write paragraphs, Mind the baby. If you haven't a baby, mind your eye, SERGENs.—Sit down again, It is not the voice of fame calling you. It is only the howl of the Cappawhoopoo, chanting the premonitory hymn of oblivion. AsriRaNT.—There is no extra charge for aspiring, so ‘we suppose you may keep on in your present business as long as you find it possible. We see no chance for you in any other line. J. Hancox. — “Can you learn’ French without a master?” Possibly you can; we really can't say posi- tively, But a cursory examination of your handwriting leads us to believe that you couldn’t learn French with- out a—well, without a regiment of college professors and a pile-driver. Liuuiz.—Let him go. He's no good. That's it, fair maid, In the coarse and vulgar language of your younger brother, he’s N. G. A young man who throws garden- sods at you when you smile on him, who trips you up with the lawn-mower if you call him Willy, and who sticks his fist in his mouth when you want to kiss him, is altogether too diffident ever to respond satisfactorily to such coy intimations of affection as a young lady is privi- leged to give him. Let him loose, Lillie, and try an easier one. New York Russer Company.—Permit us to own with thanks, receipt of invoice of small rubber Pucks, We consider them speaking—also squeaking— likenesses. An response.to your kind inquiry, we will say that we are pretty fairly supplied with “little ones.” At least, we have nothing to complain of in that way. Several olive- branches wish to send you thanks through this column. And the returns are not all in yet. In fact—well, never mind—the Pucks are very pretty, and quite an inspira- tion in toys. ‘They are the Correct Kibosh in Pucks, PS.—If you, have a couplé mote to spare you can send them in. The two bachelor members of this staff want to know why they can’t have any.