Puck — August 7, 1878 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUCK. A capaGe-Lear never feels so much at home as it does in Eli Perkins’s hat.— Derrick, Ir is the silent watches of the niga that render alarm clocks necessary.— Cin, Saturday Night. ‘Tue Eastern war is over, but hospitals will be kept running until the last harmed foe expires. —Cin. Saturday Night. ANy man pays too much for his whistle when he has to wet it fifteen or twenty times a day. —Cin, Saturday Night. In Turkey men shed tears without being called unmarly. Let's see—that’s where every man is allowed four wives, ain’t it?—Cincin- nati Breakfast Table. Ar all first-class hospitals in this country they soak green corn in paragoric forty-eight hours before giving it to convalescent patients. —Shila, Kronikle-Herald. From a hint dropped by the Philadelphia Times we infer that Mr. Bennett may fit out an expedition to discover Charles Francis Adams — Oil City Derrick. Puck says: “Hayes’s night-caps are. frilled; but an anxious world wants to know whether the frilling consists of plain lemon or lemon and whisky.""—A7vonikle. Herald. Go to the mosquito, ye shiftless; consider his energetic ways and learn gumption. On second thoughts, though, you needn't go. He'll be apt to come.— Breakfast Table, James Gorpon Bennett will invite the press of the whole country to send representa- tives to the North Pole free of charge.—£x. We speak for the bunk next to the stove,— Boston Fost. Cincinnati has a quarrel with its gas com- pany, and many of its citizens are taking to coal oil. We congratulate the coroner of that city on his prospect for increased fees. — Kronikle-Herald. Tue devil, uncaged, is going about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour; but the watchmen, what of them? ‘They have deserted the walls of Zion, and gone a-fishing. — Breakfast Labie. ‘Tue parson in the pulpit stands, His locks are thin and gray; He bends his head, he clasps his hands, And springs upon his pray. —Burlington Hawkeye. Tue weather is so intolerably hot that if the election should come off to-morrow, there isn’t a man in this district could stand it to shake hands enough to elect him to Congress.—Bur- Jington Hawkeye. Kearney, the California Communist, is now on his way East. Poor laboring men sympathiz- ing with the cause represented by Kearney will please prepare to pass over to him a por- tion of the money they need for bread.— Kronikle- Herald, lr you take one of the new silver dollars, pour a little muriatic acid on the figure of the eagle, and set it out in the sun for twenty minutes, when you come to look at it it will be gone. And the tramp who took it will be gone also.— Hawkeye. Wuire Adam and Eve were yet in Eden, when our fair young grandmother knew there wasn’t another living soul in all the wide, wide world but herself and her snoring husband, we don't suppose she ever went to sleep without first looking under the couch of moss and leaves “for a man,” and rousing Adam from his first sweet nap to ask him if he was sure he had locked the front door.— Hawskeye. APOLLINARIS NATURAL Mineral Water, The Queen of Table Waters. HIGHLY EFFERVESCENT. “The Dr, J. MILNER FOTHERGILL. London. site is: A. Delicious Beve WANKLYN, St. G. *Highly Effervescent, Whi i perior to all other lonp., absoli: Absolutely pure and R. PETER Medtcal Noc PETER SQUIR' yoth Editon of Cosipaktow 10 Surgeon to Wholesome ap., London, ceatarth of the bladder, and of the respiratory organs; agreeable and useful FREDERICK DE BARY & CO., 41 £43 Warren Street, NEW YORK. Sole Agents for United States and Canadas. FOR SALE BY DEALERS, GROCERS AND DRUGGISTS. Evere genuine bottle bears the Yellow label AND YET BEING SOLD AS. COMPRESSED sy E WORTHLESS IMITATIONS «ALL, PELISCHMANN & COS, CENCINE ARTICLE o> ——— AsiDE from the luxury of bread, corn ap- pears to contain many of the necessaries of life. For years it has furnished the basis for a good article of whisky, and now an Iowa man is making from corn the sugar that many hardened people take with their whisky.— N. 0. Picayune, Tue Shah took thirty-six caskets of gold to Paris and took away only eleven. If he had visited Niagara Falls several years ago with his thirty-six caskets of gold, and remained a week or two, he would have been obliged to borrow ten dollars from a newspaper man to get home, --Norr. Herald. Tue Rochester Express says St. Louis is raising a subscription to erect a monument to the author of ‘Beautiful Snow.” Does St. Louis intend to convert itself into a vast ceme- tery?—have a marble shaft shooting heaven- wards every ten feet or so all over the city ?— Norristown Herald, Seasipe Lots.—Mr. G. Duryee, 176 Broad- way, this city, is the general real estate agent for the Point Pleasant Land Company. He will furnish circulars, on application, giving full particulars of the scheme by which it is possible for the fortunate one to secure a lot of land below Long Branch for an investment of $275. THE GREAT EUROPEAN NOVELTY. HUNYADI JANOS. The Best Natural Aperient. ‘The Lancet. — nos. = Baron Liebig. affirm its richness in aperient salts sur- passes that of all other knowa R, Vienna, “1 have pr scribed these Waters with rem: kale success.”” PROFESSOR SCANZONI, Warsburg. “I prescribe faone but this."* PROFESSOR LAUDER BRUNTON, M. D., FP. R. Ny London, "More pleasaot than its rivals, and sure sce them ta cf6cacy. ESSOR AITKEN, M. D., F.R.S., Royal N " iefereed to Paina itary Hospit jetley. and Priedrchshait® A Wineglassful a Dose. INDISPENSABLE TO THE TRAVELLING PUBLIC. ery genuine bottle bears the name of Tne Arottinanis Co. London. Fre@’k De Bary & Co., 41 & 43 WARREN Street, y YORK, Sole Agents for the United States and Canada. FOR SALE BY DEALERS, GROCERS, AND DRUGGISTS, ‘The Label on every genuine Bottle is printed on BLUE paper MATHESIUS & FREY, MANUFACTURERS OF CABINET FURNITURE Upholatery, Decorations, &e., at Prices to suit the times. Every Article guarentee. 91 BLEECKER ST., NEW YORK. THE BLACK AND COLORED PRINTING INKS Usep on ris Paver Ann MANUPACTURED BY FRED'K H. LEVEY & CO., PRINTING INK MANUFACTURERS, 32 Beekman Street, NEW YORK. SEASIDE LOTS below LONG BRANCH, do Gis v= $275 @Ga ‘SEND FOR CIRCULAR TO G. Duryee, 176 Broadway, N. Y. Or 146 E, State Street, Trenton, N. EITHER OF THESE BUILDINGS Curries should be eaten at breakfast.— Camden Post, ‘This is probably arranged so that the tidal wave of cholera will reach you about midday, and thus do away with the trouble of waking up the neighbors, and calling the doctor at night.—Fudion Times. ‘Tre Southern Democratic press is pained to ee the Northern press indulging in “idiotics flings at President Davis.” His front name is Jefferson, and a Southern admirer says “the name of this grand old man will be emblazoned on the pages of history.” It will, indeed —with the word “traitor” immediately after it.— Norristown Herald, comicbooks.com