Puck — May 15, 1878 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUCK. SEVERAL years ago a young man put a hand- some sum of money in a savings bank, and for- got all about it until recently. The interest that naturally accrued on his capital fairly as- tonished him, as did the fact that the bank had failed soon after taking his money.—W. 0. Picayune, Hoyr’s nomination is not considered so cer- in that the Don’s presence can be dispensed with at the coming Republican convention. He will leave his blushihg bride to the delightful company of his six children, and pull the wires for the perpetuation of the tottering house of Cameron.— Pittsburgh Telegraph. Kimpatt, the church-debt r, was per- suaded to attack the debt of a New York daily newspaper a few days ago, and he was thrown seven to eight. He sustained a sprained back and a fracture of the left clavicle.. He says he is not a Samson.— Morr. Herald. THE question has been raised as to whether or not a widow of two deceased soldiers can draw pensions on both counts within the mean- ing of the pension law. It has been decided that the man cannot be too deceased for the widow's purpose.—WV. O. Picayune. Some one has discovered that there is actually a law in force which permits money to be car- ried as baggage. Since this is the case we may travel considerably this year. It was the sup- posed absence of such a law that kept us at home so much.— Norristown Herald. He was a traveler for a New York house, and while on the train he chanced to meet a very agreeable young lady from Boston, but ere he had been in her company half an hour he was compelled to improve on Byron as fol- lows: “Maid of Athens, ere we part, give, oh, give me back my watch and chain, pocket- book, gold pencil, ivory-handled penknife and cigar case, or I'll give you up to the authorities at the next station She gave them back.— Danbury News. Tue item, yesterday, stating that the pro- nunciation of Schurz” is ‘shirts’? and that consequently the clerks in the interior Depart- ment are ‘ undershirts,” has called out the fol- lowing from a correspondent: “If the clerks in the Interior Department are ‘ undershirts,’ the purity of the civil service requires that they should be changed oftener than once in four years.” — Fitchburg Sentinel. Tue vagaries of the moral sphere are a cri- terion of human value. Contemplating and ob- serving their specific inclinations, and compre- hending their special part in the completion of the chain interlinking their definite centre, we experience readily the characteristic feature prcdominatiog in each, and are sensitive of the earing of individual whims.—Miagara Index (Amateur). Map, Wetts has begun a libel suit against the Philadelphia Zimes for having accused him of stealing mules, Judging from the leading characteristics of the present Administration, and in view of the fact that Wells helped to steal it, we should say the evidence of his hav- ing stolen one mule was conclusive.— Boston Post. Tue Florida development? Yes, my dear Pelton, yes. Everything is working beautifully. Florida will keep my name before the public several weeks. ‘Then we shall pay our attention to South Carolina. ‘hen something else will turn up. Meanwhile Monty Blair will keep pounding away, and I shall have boils and go to Long Branch, and something new shall be developed month by month; so that when the next national cunvention meets I shall be the most conspicuous person this side of the usurper Hayes. He, he! it’s all right, Pelty, all right! —S.J. Tilden, in the Buffalo Express. APOLLINARIS NATURAL Mineral Water, The Queen of Table Waters HIGHLY EFFERVESCENT. WANKLYN, Nt. “Highly Effervescent, bsolutely pure and : free from all the ob im 70 THE + Good for Sickness, Dyspepsia, and Loss of C.8.1,, Surgeon to do. lore Wholesome Physician ep. London. “OF great value catarrh of the bladder, and of the able and useful DE BARY & CO., 41 £43 Warren Striet, NEW YORK. Sole Agents for United States and Canadas. FOR SALE BY DEALERS, GROCERS AND DRUGGISTS. Evere genuine bottle bears the Yellow label. AND YET BEING GOLD AS COMPRE: su WORTHLESS IMITATIONS er @ENUINE ARTICLE DENTAL OFFICE, 162 West 234 Street. Between 6. & 7. Aves, ‘The undersigned begs leave to inform the public that she con- tinves her Dental business as heretsfore, and that the most skillful work of her old and renown place is now to be had at prices to suit the times. Naw York, May 8, 1878. Most respectfully, PHILIPPINE DIEFFENBACH-TRUCHSESS. THE GREAT EUROPEAN NOVELTY. HUNYADI JANOS. The Best Natural Aperient. “Hunyadi Ja ig aliems that ia aperient salts st of all other kno OR LAUDER BRU N, 1. D., FR, pleasant than its ‘rivals, and sur KEN, M. D., F.R.S., Royal ftal, Netley. “Preferred to Pullna A Wineglassful a Dose. INDISPENSABLE TO THE TRAVELLING PUBLIC. Every genuine bottle bears the name of Tux Aroutinants Co, (imited), London. : Fre@’ls De Bary & Co., 41 & 43 WARREN Street, NEW YORK, Sole Agents for the United States and Canada, FOR SALE BY DEALERS, GROCERS, AND DRUGGISTS. ‘The Label on every genuine Bottle is printed on BLUE paper. eee EEE aEEEEEEEEee! PORTRAITS, 37 Union Square, New York. ELEVATOR. NOTICE. ' No. 26 (issue of September sth, 187) of * Puck” will be bought at this office, No. 3 North William Street, at fuil price, MATHESIUS & FREY, MANCPACTURERS OF CABINET FURNITURE Fashionable Upholstery, Decorations, &e., at Prices to suit the times. Every Article guaranteed. 91 BLEECKER ST., NEW YORK, A Micnican judge has decided that a law prohibiting barbers from pursuing their calling on Sunday is unconstitutional. It is not more unconstitutional than idiotic. A Sunday law to prevent horse-car drivers, clergymen and cooks from working will be in order next.— N. O. Picayune. Murpuy managed to dispose of a thousand yards of blue ribbon in Gotham on Sunday.— Boston Fost. It looks like a case of detirium trimmins.— Phila, Bulletin, Concressman Why-We-Laugh-Cox has been entertaining the House with the story of “A mil’ by adam site.” Such little gags become original with Sunset years after they have been used up in variety halls by Dutch comedians, —N. O. Picayune. Our lady burlesque artists will soon wear prismatically-reflecting glass slippers woven of flexible glass. I suppose beer-schooners will be half-soled and heeled for the comedians to use.—P. Ginn, in Boston Society. Ir is time for the oldest Odd Fellow to die. The oldest Mason died some weeks ago.— N. O. Picayune. Now savagely from roof to roof ‘The pussy-cat is driven, For her there is no sweet repose Nor peace nor quiet given; She hath not where to lay her head, A vagrant’s pangs do fill'er. But soon the summer time will come And bring the caterpillar. — Yonkers Gazette. comicbooks.com