Puck — November 28, 1877 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUCK. THE CAT. PHASES OF FELINE LIFE. 1, BarwartsM.—The cat of the barn-yard— undeveloped and going on natural instincts. ) (i i 2, CIVILIZATION.—The cat of the house, and her little dodges. 3, Love.—This flirtation with the window cur- tain is designed to make Thomas Tortoiseshell a little jealous. “Just like a dog! No self-respecting cat would submit to that sort of thing.” "Ge Y of sceing you on the back-fence last night. “Ah! my dear Baron, the luss was mine!” 7. INTRIGUE.—* One word, my own!” “Hush! we are observed.” 8. Bustvess.— I've come about that httle bill.” “Mr, Ringtail’s gone into the country, and won't be back till middle of next week.” Watterson profanely calls Conkling Talk- ing Bull.— Phila. Bulletin. Joun Parrrince, of Pittsburg, was thrush-ed into jail for thirty days for creating a disturb- ance.—Norristown Herald, “Wuar is money ?” asks the Batavia Zimes. Money is the missing link between man and his tailor. Ask us another.—Xome Sentinel. One Springfield (Mass.) family who counted the flies caught in their revolving-trap during the summer, found they had 22 quarts, and it wasn’t much of a summer for flies either.— Boston Traveller. Quartz does not usually abound in trap.— Phila, Bulletin. ‘THe Mexican mustang is a drug in the Pittsburg market." A Cockney friend thinks they must ‘ang ’eavy hon the dealers’ ‘ands. N. B.—We ‘must ’ang” the next fellow who gets off that pun on the poor mustang.—or- ristown Herald, “ Farner,” said a boy who got kicked in the face by a mule that he was annoying, “shall I ever be as good-looking as I was?” ‘No, my son,” answered the parent, ‘I don’t think you'll be as handsome as you were, but you'll know a great deal more.— Unidentified Ex. Tue St. Louis Journal calls Stanley Mat- thews “the Senator from Iowa.” Now, by Apollo, man, nothi:.g but—er—ah—rather shall the incarnadine seas—the seas shall’ in- cardinate—what we want to say, is, that it wil take right smart of blood to wash out that in- insult.— Hawkeye. Hon. Henry Watterson, of Louisville, ina New York interview, said “the country may as well make up its mind now to a death struggle with Grant and Grantism three years hence.” It is such idiotic declarations as this that upset the long established belief that Kentucky whisky is the most powerful and confusing in the Union.— Norristown Herald, SECRETARY THOMPSON is a transparent fraud. After all his talk about “ nor’ by nor’-east" and “keeping her about three points off” and “blasting his tarry toplights” and shouting “star bo! leens ahoy” toa friend across the street, and going along hitching his pantaloons, it has transpired that the old sea-dog wears sus- penders. Let this man be impeached at once. Publig sentiment will listen to no talk of con- ciligtfoniit’such a case as this.— Hawkeye. “ Hev they planted him yet ?” said the Gov- | omor to his companion, who was watching the funeral procession from a window of the State- house. ‘They’re a dumpin’ the coffin,” re- plied the companion; “down she goes; they’re a fillin’ in the hole.” “ Then I reckon there'll be no indecent haste if I fill in Tall Sycamore’s commish,” and while he worked on the docu- ment there was silence only once interrupted by the Governor's question, ‘‘Do you spell ‘Senator’ ‘C-e-n-e? or ‘C-e-n-i' ?"—Chicago Tribune, ao