Puck — June 27, 1877 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JouNn-Avams, son. of; Charles Francis; -has made a marble bust of his father; andthe sole objection to, it) is, that’ the marble gives him a warm, genial look, entirély foreign’ to the original,— Rochester Democrat. Darwin believes that birds have religious | distinétions. Of course, hens belong to the laity.— Yonkers Gazelle, ‘Tuere is an old/adage, ‘(A place for. every- thing, and everything in.its place.” We sug- gest that a man’s stomach in June ain't: that place.— Petersburgh Fosts.’ It. is now proposed to make arrangements for issuing a $2 gold coin, and the whole thin; looks like an underhanded attempt to put gold entirely beyond the reach of newspaper men.— Bridgeport Standard. Younc men of the middle classes are so little | disposed to marry, these times, that parents of marriageable daughters will have to resort to | the seductive chromo.— Zurner’s Falls Reporter. | | | PUCK. Durinc the storm last Friday, one of Bur- | lington’s best young men was struck by light- | ning, but fortunately escaped serious injury. The bolt struck one of the points of his stand- ing collar, but long before it could get down to the young man’s neck the electric fluid gave it up.— Hawkeye. Scene at a sea-side hotel: { Lean, lank stranger —‘Why, look here, you | | | | charge me in my bill for a counterpane $6.50. | Why, the mosquitoes ate up that counterpane, | and why should I be charged with it?” Hotel-keeper—“ Of course\ you should. | If | | youvhad been nice and fat, the mosquitoes | would have tackled you, and let my countér- pane alone!""—Philadelphia Bulletin. Persons who have seen a Piute Indian in a | plug hat, and observed the effect, will be able to form some estimate as to General Grant’s appearance when he comes to wear the honorary | and ornamental title of Doctor of Civil Law.— Worcester Rewey. | remarked a Fond du Lac man, as he moved “Tue Turks are reported as having disap- peared from Promisori:’’) ‘That must be a place of note; saysithe Commercial Advertiser. Tris is the season when dumb-bell exercise gives place to wrestling with mosquitoes. —Syra- cuse Standard, “We brought nothing into the ‘world; and thank hokey we can’t take anything out of it,” the bedstead for the seventh time around soit would stand some other way.—ond du Lac Commonwealth, THREE weeks ago, in” Oil City, strawberries locked themselves in a glass-case and turned up their noses if anybody except in whose veins ran royal blood, or had an oil-well, looked in upon them. To-day they sit out on the open sidewalk, flirt with the lowest plebeian, and take turns at yelling, ‘Only five cents a quart!” — Oil City Derrick. Secretary Evarts has served notice that we Wuite growling at her husband the other | want justice from Spain, and that no nonsense day, a New York woman was struck by light- | will be permitted. Spain will regard it as a ning, and instantly killed. If you wish your | big joke, and hire some New York lawyer to Mrs. Lyp1a SHERMAN, the poisoner, has been recaptured. We were in hopes that she would | fascinate and marry Ben Butler. -- Augusta (Ga.) Chronicle. | A ‘suBscriBer” asks the Norristown Herald : “Would you advise a healthy young man to go to the Black Hills?” And the editor responds: “Tf the young man lives in a populous neigh- borhood, and is learning to play the cymbals or accordeon, we would advise him to start for the Black Hills at once. Such a trip may be the means of saving his life—and the lives of his neighbors.” Berore starting for the river for the purpose of-taking a bath or a swim, please send your cards to this office. We do hate to spell even a drowned man’s name wrong.—/iiladelphia Chronicle. Tue human body expands immensely with age. When eleven young men are seated on one side of a street-car, they can easily sit up a little closer, and make room for a pretty girl; but three of them can monopolize an entire seat to the utter exclusion of an old woman.— Hawkeye. Mr. Benson was out in his garden Monday daubing a coat of tar on the trunk of a choice wife to see this paragraph, cut.it out and paste it on the looking-glass.— PhiladelphiaChronicle. | Eealich Patent ae wf cherry tree, when his next-door neighbor, with [3 whom he is not on very good terms, came out and industriously set to work nailing lath be- tween the pickets on the line fence. ‘I thought I'd fix this tree so that your dog wouldn't be able to get into it when the cherries are ripe,” sarcastically observed Benson, as the work went on. “Yes, I see,” was the reply, “and it re- minded me that if the space was reduced, your cat couldn’t reach through and pick my rasp- berries.” A deep and profound silence fol- lowed.— Fulton Times. “1 say, boss,” remarked a lunch fiend in John O'Connor's Union Square room, at the same time throwing in his mouth huge slices of corned-beef. ‘I was jest going to ask yer if yer couldn't send my victuals round to my stopping-place after this. I am gitten tired comin’ over here so often, an’ I only live around the corner, wher’ you could send them just as well as not."— Cincinnati Enquirer. Tuus discourses the Norristown Herald, which is always strong on astronomy: “Do you know Winnecke? No? Well, Mr. Winnecke has discovered a comet with two tails, one of which is a million miles in length. A comet built on this principle can bid defiance to the flyest kind of fly time, and Mr. Winnecke is to be warmly commended for making a new departure in discovering comets. It is about time the one-tailed comet had gone out of fashion.” Aa * Rtasant Nee ae Nise ee The Puck Publishing Co. send by mail to any point within the United States a Palmo Sun Shade on receipt of $1.50. talk her out of her difficulty with the best gov- ernment on earth.— Cincinnati Enquirer. WIZ Y AVE —*t = comicbooks.com