Life — August 30, 1928 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Little Rambles with Serious Thinkers In soft years of ease, our soft manners and softer religion, or no visible religion atall, seem to suffice the world at large. But in times of stress, it is the Roughneck and it is his simple and stark Faith which comes to the front and saves the day, A hundred times throughout history, it has teen so. Always must it be so. —Albert Payson Terhune. They say liquor is being served in New York. If that is so it ought to be stopped. —Mayor James ]. Walker. Ido not scoff at youthful love. Far from it—Fanny Ward. Sex and youth are only the vanguards of maturity and love-—Fannie Hurst. As for women, I don’t believe that they ever fall in love at all—H. L. Mencken. I look upon horrible dreams as one of the assets of humanity; because one feels so elated after waking. —Wilham Lyon Phelps. You can't be a good American and be crooked.—Clarence Budington Kelland. Young people, I think, are more serious now than ever before about marriage. —Albert E. Wiggam. The Human Body According to the Comic Strips Ir is impervious to the following or- dinarily deadly instruments: _ bullets, tombs, shrapnel; razors, stilettos and cut- ery in general. If any of these do pene- wate, they cither go right through as though nothing had happened, or else are completely ignored while inside. Cannon balls merely carry it for a ride. A brickbat thrown at the skull bounces of with a noise like “WHAM!", “ZOWIE!" or “OUCH!” It survives any such discomfort as be- ing held under water for a day, until the appearance of the sequel strip, breathing “G-L-LLL-U-UP!” If dropped from a forty-story building it lands with a “THUD!” and rises im- mediately to assume its part in the next box. If that is the last box, however, it gets twenty-four hours off for rest. In sleep it always makes a noise like wood being sawed—"Zzzz2222222.” _ When severely stunned, the pupils of its eyes assume the geometric form of a cross. It always observes active astronom- ical bodies in unconsciousness. When surprised, it rises obliquely and backwards off its feet, with hair absolutely “Tue Scucrtor Was Lost in His Work.” perpendicular to the scalp, as though drawn by a huge vacuum. In babyhood, it never has less or more than one single, solitary hair. Bernaré Teran. “Wat was that explosion over in Delaware—one of the powder factories blow up?” “No, just a DuPont gone Demo- cratic.” Wire: Darn it, I simply can’t find my bathing suit anywhere! Hussanp: Maybe you've got it on, dear. Invocation By a Jazz-Sick Soul Ou, curse me a curse for the slide trom- bone! Oh, curse me a worse for the saxophone! Oh, curse me the blare of the baritone! Oh, curse the whole orchestra gaily! But save me the vilest, the deadliest curse For an instrument worse, indisputably worse. j Oh, shout it in prose! Oh, scream it in verse! Oh, curse me the curst ukulele! Asia Kagowan. comicbooks.com