Life — March 17, 1927 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Man Who Writes the French Composition Books Becomes a Dramatic Critic THE play which I visited last 1) night was not good. (2.) The which I have read was better than play which I have seen. (3.) Al- h the tall man who had killed his ¢ was handsome he was not an actor. 4.) The large blonde lady was as good the wife of my gardener. 5,) The acting of the pretty female yusin was adequate, (6.) She was both all and agile. (7.) The stout gentle- ion who was sitting behind me was vaghing loudly. (8.) If he had died I jould not have been sorry. (9.) I have ft in the theatre my greatcoat and um- rella. (10.) Have you pens, ink, and psper? (11.) Write in French concern- which you have seen. W.W. Scott. n actres: ACCORDINGLY, HE SALLIED OUT TO SEE HIS PAL, GUS WHO WAS, IT WILL BE “INCREDIBLE AS IT MAY BE, 1 WISH TO BUY SOME DRUGS,” HIMMELKRAUT, NDERSTOOD, A DRUGGIST IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD, SAID HE; AND, WIEN THE DRUGGIST IAD REVIVED, THEY GOT TOGETHER AND CONNIVED. Life. Lines UST to learn what happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object, we should like to see an inquir- ing reporter tackle an information de- partment. 5 Of 106 murders reported in Berlin in twenty months, 103 were completely solved by the police. Such a condition would never be tolerated here, as_it would be taking the bread out of the mouths of starving tabloid reporters. a In the old days, when a man praised the laws of his nation we called him a patriot. Nowadays we call him a boot- legger. LL ng saturation point in the automobile in- dustry has been put off a few more years by dealers’ setting a quota of two or three cars for every family. Here's hoping this won't establish a precedent for the saxophone manufac- turers, The ever-reces Brute! OUNG WIFE: Hubby, dear, Mother writes that she is coming to see us soon. Youno Huspanp: Ah, another mouth to heed. Gosh, What a Difference Just Ten Years Make! EN years ago when you went into a barber shop you were assured of get- ting the real low-down on why: Wilson would be elected again. The Giants would win the pennant. The country never would go dry. Willard would remain champion until he retired. Bill didn’t hook that big one. Joe was blackballed. Charley’s stenographer week before. quit the But when you stagger in now for a shave you get the real low-down on why: Ensemble suits never will be popu- lar again. It’s all right to go to teas every day, if you care for that sort of thing, my dear, imply can’t get large head- sizes any more. Her husband is so anxious to work evenings at the office, y ought to fire that girl at the ar stand. She can wear them above her knees, but everybody'll still know she’s fifty, if she’s a day. If she was my daughter I'd turn her over my knee and spank her. Chet Johnson. His Odd Predicament BIS: I've got something I want to tell one of those twins but I can’t tell them apart. Jinxs: Well, why don’t you tell them together, then? Binks: But I don’t want to marry them both! THE BEEPING JAM AT MICHAEL’s POST WENT DOWN IN HISTORY—ALMosT! NO COP THAT TANGLES RED CAN KEEP THE TRAFFIC SWE N. BEFORE THEY TORE HIM LIMB FROM LIMB A CAPTAIN CAME AND RESCUED HIM AND PUT HIM ON THE MORALS SQUAD WHERE BLINDNESS 18 4 GIFT OF Gop! HIS JUICY PICKINGS ON THE SIDE ENABLED MIKE TO TAKE A BRIDE; 80 ROSIE NAMED THE HAPPY DATE, WHILE DIRTY DENNIS GOT THE GATE! AND 80—aAs ve OBSERVED ABOVE— FIGHT FAIR, MY SON, IN WAR OR LOVE. Arthur M. Sherwood, Jr. comicbooks.com