Life, 1925-10-22 · page 63 of 74
Life — October 22, 1925 — page 63: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct satirical pieces mocking New York society and human nature: **"Carol of a Loyal Gothamite"**: A poem ridiculing wealthy New Yorkers who claim to love the city while constantly fleeing it seasonally—to Newport (spring), Bermuda (autumn), Palm Beach (winter), and Coney Island (summer). The satire exposes the contradiction: the narrator "loves" New York yet has "never lingered there." **"The Pessimist"**: A short story mocking civic boosterism. Wealthy citizens enthusiastically pledge donations for grand public buildings (City Hall, library, hospital, opera houses), but when one man pragmatically suggests funding a swamp-drainage project—the unglamorous prerequisite for construction—they literally tear him apart. It satirizes how people prefer glamorous projects over practical necessities. **"The Italicizers"**: A brief joke about wealthy Americans who summer under blankets (suggesting discomfort abroad) then winter in Florida with "practically nothing over them"—mocking the pretense and discomfort of leisure travel. All three pieces target wealthy, fashionable society's contradictions and vanities.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Carol of a Loyal Gothamite NEW YORK'’S the town of towns for me, My only home, my only true port; when spring waltzes in, I flee To Newport I love the sunsets that emboss Each building with a golden streamer summer finds me on a cross- steamer), What can surpass Fifth Avenue Arrayed with festive dame and dude? (A Pity that autumn brings me to Hermuda !) t is off to Central Park, Coney Island's lone and calm beach (Although the winter draws my To Palm Beach) hark New York is one unending fair— I'm always chanting loudly of it; And though I've never lingered there, I love it. Simonetta, I want to be left alone; AY don't care for publicity. Acext: Great! I'll make a out of this, Press Mother: Darling Son: “WAS THERE A CONGENIAL CROWD ON “OM, YES—EVERY BODY WAS SO SOKRY THE BOAT?” TO COMP HOME.” The Pessimist ae E must have a City Hall that will reflect credit on our town,” cried the Chairman, “A gor- geous building of shiny white marble. Will every gentleman here pledge him- glorious NICE LITTLE BOYS DON’T FIGHT. NAW, THEY GET THE PA} ‘S BEAT OFP’N “EM, self to contribute five thousand dollars towards a fund to build it?” A great shout of from the multitude enthusiasm rose “And a magnificent library, towards which we will cach contribute another five thousand,” the Chairman tinued. con- A greater roar of assent An enormous hospital, a giant rail- road station, a beautiful park, wide, well-paved — streets, civic centers, churches, auditoriums, opera houses— all these and more the Chairman pro- posed and to each proposal his auditors assented with splendid enthusiasm. Presently a thin, dark-faced man rose in the meeting and spok “I propose that we raise a small fund to fill in the swamp on which we're going to erect these agnificent build- ings,” he began, but he got no further. The assemblage of Florida realtors set upon him in their wrath and rent him limb: from limb. J.K.M. The Italicizers “THE people who spent the summer somewhere actually sleeping under blankets will now spend the winter in Florida sleeping with practically nothing over them at all. comicbooks.com