Life, 1924-12-25 · page 32 of 37
Life — December 25, 1924 — page 32: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Life* magazine contains primarily **humor columns and advertisements** rather than political cartoons. The main satirical content includes: **"Our Foolish Contemporaries"** — a recurring *Life* feature mocking crossword puzzle definitions that deliberately misdefine words (e.g., "small saltwater fish" = "Orgies," "person of low mentality" = "Idiom"). This ridicules both pretentious word puzzles and the absurdity of mismatched definitions. **Anecdotes and jokes** about: - An Eastern tourist's overwrought romantic narrative undercut by mundane reality (eating dates) - A Paris bus conductor's confusion about a child's height based on paternity - A teacher's frustration teaching proper English to a Southern dialect speaker - A servant's evasive answer about missing roast beef These sketch-style humor pieces satirize social pretension, class differences, and linguistic/cultural confusion — typical of *Life*'s sophisticated, urbane comedy targeting educated readers. **The advertisements** (Williams Shaving Cream, Marmola weight-loss tablets) occupy significant space, reflecting 1920s consumer culture.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Look your best Williams will help your skin. It will tone it up, soothe it, improve it, every time you shave. And you'll like the noticeably greater and thoroughness with which Williams softens the beard. Sold by all dealers. Large size tube 85c; double size tube S0c, containing twice as much cream. Williams Shaving Cream + With the Hinge—Cap you can’t lose a An Eastern Scene The mysterious Eastern sunset filled the evening with its erubescent hues; a bul-bul above sang three pure notes as if heralding the approach of the volup- tuous night when the very breeze seems steeped in the drowsiness of despair. From afar came the regular rhythmic beat of the camels performing the camel- trot; while in the primitive café near by a dancing girl rivalled the houris in the sensuousness of her movements. I took the lid off and began to eat the dates inside. —N. A. de B., in Cambridge Granta. KOBLER AIR AND WATER PEARL PIPE ‘Takes out of the smoke 19% Nicotin, 85% Pyridin, 33% Ammoniac. $5.00. Literature free. Kabler & Co, tac, $94 2600 St, Gattenberg, West New Yr, W. J. FOR _g MEN OF BRAINS IGARS “MADE AT KEY WEST— - LIFE - FOOLISH aaa From the Crossword Puzzlers’ Dictionary Small saltwater fish of the perch fam- ily. Orgies. Queer, retiring people; hermits. An- chovies, A kind of enormous turtle very popu- lar in soup. Tarpaulin. A small, ill-bred boy; a street arab. Gamut, A person of very low mentality. Idiom, Unimaginative, commonplace; lacking in animation. Mosaic. A bivalve of the oyster family. Trollop. The god of wine. Abacus. A Spanish shawl of lace. Flotilla, A sideboard or street lunchroom, Buffoon. Germs; bacteria. Basilica. A prehistoric beast. Thesaurus, Plural of snipe. Snoop. —H. I. Phillips, in New York Sun. In a Pinch, use ALLEN’S FOOT-EASE Heredity A friend of those famous clowns, the Fratellinis, says that one of the troupe recounts this incident as having occurred. in a Paris omnibus. A woman with a child got into the bus. When the conductor came she asked for one ticket. The conductor looked hard at the child, and then said: “But you must pay for a ticket for him.” “Oh,” said the mother, “but he is not old enough to want a ticket.” “He must be very tall for his age,” replied the conductor. “Yes, but you see, his father’s a giant,” explained the mother. —Sketch (London). Glass Ginger Ale with tablespoontul Abbott's Bitters delightful tonic and palatable. Sampie Bitters by mall, 25 cts. In stampa. C. W. Abbott & Co. Baltimore, Md: Lost in a Maze “I once tried to teach a little Alabama boy to speak pure English,” writes Oc- tavus Roy Cohen. “I'll never forget the despairing way he said to me at the end of the thirtieth or fortieth lesson: ‘Dey aren’t no “ain't you,” is dey? It's “aren't you,” ain't it??"—Boston Transcript. Her Salad Days Mistress: I'd like to know, Norah, what has become of all the roast beef and cake left over from yesterday. Noran: Now, mum, didn’t yer never "ave a policeman callin’ on yer when yer was my age?—London Opinion. Terr seems to be one law for the rich and one for the poor, and about two million for the middle class. —Memphis News-Scimitar, ou must be slender to have bobbed hair- For the shingle bob or the straight bob, you must have a youthful silhouette. One simply can’t be stout—or even overweight. How thankful we should be that there is one pleasant method of taking off weight. Noexercises or diets—just use Marmola Tab- lets (thousands of men and women each yearregainhealthy, slender iguresthis way). Have you ever tried them? Many of your slender, vivacious friends use Marmola Tablets. All drug stores have them— one dollar a box, Or they will be sent in plain wrap- ', postpaid, by the Marmola Co., 1843 Baba Motors Bldg., Detroit, Mich. MARMOLA Prescription Tablets he Pleasant Day toleduce New Hosts of Olympus Olympian gods and goddesses, As they aver who read Their Homers and their Odysseys, Were proven friends in need, But were their counsels set at nought Or aught did them displease, Th’ immortals very quickly brought The hero to his knees. Those gods no longer facilely In human strife engage, But marshal hosts of bacilli To work their spite or rage; Yet none the less to work their will And vengeful moods appease They bring, with all their pristine skill, The hero to his sneeze. —A.W., in London Daily Chronicle. Triumph A Ford owner jubilantly displays the following sign on his “Coop”: “This car used to belong to a De- troit millionaire. One more payment and it’s mine.”"—Kansas City Star. MEDITERRANEAN (Jan. 31) AROUND THE WORLD (Jan. 30) NORWAY and MEDITERRANEAN ( aly 1) Seasonal cruises by superd. specially . Gitex gales tore’ cie, ‘Burepean stopovers. d EST EXPERIENCED MANAGEMENT Expert staff. Limited membership. SOUTH AMERICA. Small party leaves Jan. 22 Please speclfy program dextred. CLARK'S TOURS Times Bidg., N. Y. comicbooks.com