Life — July 12, 1923 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

No Show in Tulsa Will Rogers, who is leaving the Follies for motion pictures, has been pressed to return to his home town of Tulsa, Oklahoma, and give a show in an armory which seats 10,000 people, “But I’m not going,” says Rogers. “Not back there where they all know me. Why, they’d say, ‘Will’s just talking the way he used to on the street cor- ner round here. Old Cap Stallings can talk more than that. This is no show.’” —New York World. This England “I am English, born and bred,” an- nounced the political candidate. “My father and grandfather were English, my wife is English, my works are in England and my workpeople are all English. I stand before you as an English candidate.” And then a pitying voice came from the audience: “Oh, man, hae ye nae ambeetion ava?”—Sport- ing and Dramatic News (London). Ah, Ha! Fooled You! Feperat CLrerk: Who was the first NOTICE: Basic and Supplementary Patents coveriog Steel Goll Shafts are controlled exclaively by wh 9th Green, Inwood C. C. Inwood, ‘Long Island Everywhere the Steel Shaft see the Bristol Steel Golf Shaft. All who have actually played Vitis, praise 7 because it gives Confidence to their game—confdence that theit clubs Wit as’ good as any on the course, confidence that they will “stand the gaf?”, that they hhang and feel right, that the balance is where it should be. istol Steel Golf Shafts are of the same quality. They make golf a real game ot aiiPer eli sifterence in club values is eliminated. ‘They come in all degrees of whip: Diness to fill every demand. ‘They will not warp, crack or rust. Professionals and Sporting Goods Dealers: This is a steel shaft year. Thousands are being sold. Write today for information. a istol Steel Shafted Clubs can be purchased in the best golf supply stores and Beist a treofescional at the country club. They are supplied by The Crawford, TeGeegar & Canby Co., Dayton, Ohio; A. G, Spalding &_Bros., New York: Wkce E. Wilson & Co., Chicago; The Hillerich & Bradsby Co., Louisville, Ky; President of the United States? Citizensute AppLicant: Christo- pher Columb. F. C.: I didn’t ask you who discoy- ered America. C. A.: Well, I no said Georga da Wash, ain’t it? —American Legion Weekly. | Ina Pinch, Use ALLEN’S FOOT-EASE The Return and The Burke Golf Co., Newark, Ohio. Bristol, Conn. The Horton Mfg. Co. The home paper said, “Mr. Loaf has returned from college to enter busi- ness.” He said, “I had a nervous break- down from overwork.” And the Dean said, “Get out.” —Princeton Tiger. do ———) Steel Fishing Rods : with Bristol Steel Fishi Meek and Blue Grass Rotisand Kngtuker Silk Fishing Lines. They not only catch fish but fur- ‘nish the most fun in so doing. “There's a style for every kind of fishing. Bristol, Meek and Kingfisher Catalogs mailed free on request. The Tipperary Way She was an Irish maid from Tip- perary, and when the visitors expected for lunch turned up at 4:30 she ex- plained what had happened. “Sure,” she said. “The masther and misthress waited for ye till three, and then they hoped ye wouldn’t come, so they went out.” —London Daily Express. Countering First Puciist: Call yourself a champeen? I'd knock your block off for two cents. Seconp Pucitist: Yeah. That would look like a big purse to you. —Louisville Courier-Journal. Time to Re-tire? FISK “YES, WE CAN TAKE YOU UP IN AN AEROPLANE, BUT YOU UNDERSTAND THE CONDITIONS, IF YOU FALL FROM A HEIGHT OF TEN THOU- SAND FEET YOU CAN DEMAND AN INDEMNITY FROM US. BUT IN NO CASE WILL WE ADMIT CLAIMS AGAINGE, US BY YOUR HEIRS,” A Cattrorniay is now photograph- —Le Journal Amusant (Paris). ing people's thoughts, Thin pleasant, Please—Boston Transcript, comicbooks.com