Life, 1922-11-30 · page 7 of 36
Life — November 30, 1922 — page 7: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This 1950 *Life* magazine page contains humorous fake advertisements ("Signs in the Heavens in 1950") — absurdist product pitches disguised as celestial prophecies — and two separate pieces below. The main illustration shows a dinosaur skeleton in what appears to be a museum, with two children looking up at it. The caption jokes about an "engagement with the osteopath tomorrow," playing on the skeleton's obviously broken/misaligned posture. Below are two short prose pieces: "Not Really Slipping" (about an elderly farmer's health), and "Appraisal" (character sketches in verse form). These appear to be humorous vignettes rather than political commentary—typical *Life* magazine fare mixing satire, domesticity, and mild social observation without specific contemporary references.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Signs in the Heavens in 1950 You Are NEARING THE SiLver Tri- pent—Neptune's Finest HoTeL * * * . Saturn Rinc Trres,ARE Goop Tires Tuey Start Your PLANE Orr Ricut * oe * Orion Betts For Fat Figures Look FoR THE THREE STAR TRADEMARK 2 & Mitxy Way Branp Mirx’s Tue Best From ConTENTED Cows—Every One a STAR ee * Dr. Uranus GotpEN MECHANICAL Discovery FoR Run-Down AIRPLANES * * * Lite Bear Hams ann Bacon Hicuest AWARD AT THE Pan- CevestT1aL Exposition * oe * Tue CassioperA CHAIR. MAKES A Cozy Diriciste—It Has Aways Hetp a HicH Pace * * * Great Dipper WHISKY MELLow AS THE Moon * * * Own Your Own Canat on Mars Like Livine 1n HEAVEN * * * Stop aT THE ~ OLE StTar For SoME Nortuern Licuts FavoriTE CIGARETTES OF THE UNIVERSE E. JK. Not Really Slipping WAS relieved to get a letter from Mother to-day. When I was down on the farm for Thanksgiving dinner she confided to me that she feared Father was slipping a little. She said that he had begun to diet. Father is seventy-four years old and still runs the farm himself. He never has had the slightest ill health. So of course I was dis- turbed. Mother said that Vhanks- giving morning, breakfast was a lit- tle late, and as the family dinner was at noon Father thought he wouldn’t eat much breakfast. So he stopped with nineteen pancakes, took only three helpings of the sau- sage and only a few of the fried eggs. Mother was worried. She didn't like to see Father having to diet so as to enjoy the next meal. “That reminds me, Ethel; don’t forget that you have an engagement with the osteopath to-morrow.” There were twenty-three at the Thanksgiving dinner. I had been doing some gymnasium and road work in preparation and was in fine condition. So I was actually able to eat enough to please Mother. I believe if I had taken those floor exercises the trainer advised I could have eaten a fourth piece of mince pie. As it was, the only person who ate more than I was Father. Mother writes that it’s all right. That evening she found Father ran- sacking the ice box. He’s not really slipping. McC. H, Appraisal E is vicious, hard, and vain, Always striking some new pose, Ugly, lying, cracked of brain,— So, at least, say all his foes. He is virtue’s gleaming light, Generous with his dividends, Handsome, truthful, very bright, So, at least, say all his friends. This is all you ever can Learn of any mortal man. RS. H. comicbooks.com