Life — December 16, 1915 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ELISA Hooven% “TAM BLEASED TO INFORM YOUR MAJESTY DOT WE HAVE CHUST SHOT A ¥ YOUNG VIMMEN,' “ DONNERWETTER! FOOLISHNESS! ! Belgium, but deplore the petering out of our Government’s bold demands anent the Lusitania. Others feel that we are letting German malefactors walk over us in sinking ships and de- stroying munition plants; others that we have been monstrously remiss in defending Americans and foreigners in Mexico; others that we have let the Philippines go to the dogs and sent there an unworthy governor who has undone the work of devoted men. Some complainers blame all these al- leged failings on Mr. Wilson. Others, with a somewhat better sense of jus- tice, blame them on democratic in- capacity. These mourners contradict one another and disagree in their charges, but they feel sincerely bad, because they think the country is los- ing honor, The cumulative weight of the despondency of all these persons is geting to be a pretty heavy load on the administration. It is worth while to cheer them up, if it can be done. The President’s message will doubt- less be some help to their spirits It calls for a marked increase in military DISS ISS NO TIME FOR BLEASUR preparation and gives the reasons why it is desirable. It speaks with proper disparagement of the disposition towards a divided allegiance shown by some of our citizens. It denounces the activity of certain agencies in destruc- tive machinations against lawful indus- tries of the country. It rebukes those persons whose sympathy with one side or the other of the nations at war has led them to abuse their own govern- ment and defame the honor of their own country. Citizens who have felt that the ground was somehow slipping out from under their feet have now something that they can stand on. They all want more soldiers, sailors, ships and arms. Their President has now asked for them, and it is up to Con- gress to provide them. It should cheer them further to notice that several foreign agents have been tried and convicted of violation of our shipping laws, and that the re- call of two members of the German Embassy has been requested because of improper activities in their country’s behalf. They are likely to be further 1195 gratified in a very short time by the resumption of pressure to get proper redress for the sinking of the Lusitania, and by increasing liveliness in pursuit of incendiaries and exploders. It is very trying to have to be idle when one has got worked up to the point of action. That has been the matter with our despondent friends. Opportunities of patriotic effort have not been offered in quantities to suit their zeal. It has not been anybody's fault, but they have felt that somebody was to blame, and have hit, as a rule, at the tallest head in sight. Cheer up, despondent brethren. The long summer of your discontent (seven months of it) has probably ended, and a season of activity looks to be at hand. Anything may happen at any moment now, and if crises still lag, it is open to any fermenting patriot to go over to Washington and punch up Congress. SL gob, NRY FORD really did get off, and has not been turned back yet at this writing. It is a happiness to think of that won- derful yachting party bounding over the deep at the costs of the adventur- ous Detroit Fortunatus! Andrew Carnegie never thought of anything so sporty as that. What one hates to think is that such a party must arrive and break up! Why should it arrive? Why disband? The Flying Dutchman never arrived: its company never disbanded. There is a precedent for Henry. Let him buy the Oscar II and keep sailing that cargo of pacifiers around, putting individuals ashore only in response to calls by wire- less. Thus when the Allies capture Ber- lin, if they want Ben Lindsay to be Governor, put Ben ashore, but not till then, Sam McClure always needs a rest. He is years behind in repose. This is his chance to get it! O Navis! as Horace would say—O ship that carries Henry and all those iving curiosities; do not occupy any port; keep sailing of them around and have the newspapermen keep accurate logs of what happens. Meanwhile, perhaps the nations will stop fighting to laugh. comicbooks.com