Life — December 3, 1914 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ERR CLLIFE A4t The Night Before Christmas (The following variation of the lines of the late Clement C. Moore were found in the waste-basket of a recently deceased Futurist Poet, Mr. Esra Whack, and by his Execu- tors were forwarded to me with the request that I find a market for them somewhere, the proceeds to be de- voted to the erection of a Monu- ment to Mr, Whack on the Summit of Mt. Popocatapetl, or possibly in the crater of Mt, Vesuvius. John Kendrick Bangs.) NIGHT of darkness ‘twas Enveloping a mansion all so chill that e’en the mice were motionless. From out the ethereal vault all black with gloom Right suddenly, and warningless As some dropped meteor flashing through the mists, A fall of venison impacted on the roof— Four hungering stags Whose ribs nigh naked showed like barrel-hoops beneath their galléd hides. Behind them sped a sleigh that groaned beneath a load of useless things, guided by one Whose middle-name was Corpulence— A fat old man whose paunch gelatin- ous = — This is the particular year for practical presents. Waterman’s Ideals are a certain fulfillment of the happy Christmas gift sentiment. They are suitable on every gift list. Waterman's Ideals are universally Shook like the roof the while he trod. A greasy thing he was, white-bearded like some patriarchal pard of other days— A moth-bit, sleazy Falstaff, dressed in turkey-red and imitation mink. “Whoa there, you slithering Moose!” he roared, and tied the antlered beasts unto a laundry-pole that towered nigh the coping of the eaves. The slat-ribbed steeds all whoaed, and with their velvet tongues Licked seven zons’ soot from off the chimney-pots— e— FoF — known as the standard pens, There are two generations of pen-making in back of them. They are handsome in finish and design, and made to last and do good work for years. According to the purse or the person, you can select perfectly plain pens or those handsomely mounted in gold or silver, Some mounting is generally preferred for gift pens. Gold points can be had to suit every hand and character of writing and may be exchanged until suited. Waterman’s Ideal pen service can be had throughout the world. From the Regular, Safety or Self-Filling Types of Waterman's Ideals can be selected appropriate pens for busi- ness, social or student life for men, women or the young folks, Bea ir ier A quiet little trip, any day—every day—away from {the heat, dust and constant din of city life, in a com- fortable, modern "MATTHEWS" Craft—GREAT! ‘The name of "MATTHEWS" stands for absolute berfection in modern motor yacht building. Plans and photographs furnished tothose interested. THE MATTHEWS BOAT CO, Port Clinton, Ohio Dulors ofthe Works Pamet Meter Yachts of cat | z Clip-ce-Cap a told gift folder mailed upon request. tated Prices $2.50 to $50.00. withoet baod 2Sc. extra $3.00 = 24 School St., Boston 115 Se. 107 Notre Dame St., W., Montreal SQ iy Mastrated Waterman's Ideal Insist upon the genuine-Water- man's Ideal. Pocket Pew In attractively . Noe designed boxes for Christmas, oe ingest Lsedon fiver Fina Sold Everywhere at the Best Retail Stores. cuesec cap Clipsetap L. E. Waterman Company, 173 te iia a New York z extra 2Sc, extra |7 Stockton St., San F; F Pgr ng sorcery hiram The only food they'd had for cighteen days. Beneath, Below those blackened pots, Beyond the sinuous flues, Pinned to the mantelpiece, Swung sixteen pairs of undarned socks, by greedy children placed In hope of gifts of poisoned sweets, germ-laden toys in sweatshops made, (Continued on page 986.) “a's conc!” comicbooks.com