Life — October 15, 1914 — page 36: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

684 O OLISH OUR F CONTEMPORARIES 6G A Settlement Mr. Golden had a new office-boy. A few days after his arrival some money was missed from the cash-drawer. Calling the new boy into the private office, Mr. Golden said, severely : “There is ten dollars gone from my cash-drawer, Albert. Now you and I are the only people who have keys to that drawer.” “Well,” replied the boy, cheerfully, ach pay five dollars and pose we say no more about it?” —Harper's Magazine. A teaspoonful of Abbott's Bitters with your Grape Froi| y mal makes an ideal appetizing tonic. Sample of bitters Bets. in stamps. C. W. Abbott & Co,, Baltimore, M: An “Oozer” The visiting lady had kept her hostess the open door fully half an hour ng good-bye, Finally an irate mascu- line voice indoors called out: "Sa Maria, if you're going out, go; if you're but for heaven's sak "Harper's Magazine. Comfort Without Extravagance, Hotel Woodstock, New York, Mistress: Why have you put two hot-water bottles in my bed, Bridget? Brive Sure, mum, wan of t was leaking, and T didn’t know which, so I put both in to make sure.—Punch. Scorrer: Where will you find the Upright Citizen in New York? New Yorker: Begging for the price of a ni 's lodging. —IWashington Star. You get Guaranteed Fit, Color and Wear; pre- hrunk Neckbands; your own sleeve length—in Shirts— $1.50 up. A New Shirt for One Free ofa Gentle A] man's Dress” with Cata- dog of Emery Shirts, Address M. STEPPACHER & BRO.. Inc. Philadelphia EGYPTIAN Dp) DEITIES «' j p Valuable Inaccuracy Pat was a witty young recruit, who was taking instruction in marksmanship. The squad had finished firing. Pat was brought to task for his poor shooting, and told that be must do better at the next distance; there were to be seven rounds of quick firing. “Now, Pat,” the sergeant told him, “fire at target number five.” Pat banged away, and hit target number four seven times in succession. “What target did you aim at?” asked the irate officer. “Number five, sor,” answered Pat. “And you have hit number four every time.” “Bedad, sor,” retorted Pat, “that would be a grand thing in war. Sure, I might aim at a private and hit a gin’ral!"— Youth's Companion, Vindication of a St. Joseph Pastor The Rev. J. H. Brooks, pastor of the New Hope Baptist Church (colored) of St. Joseph, was acquitted last week of the charge of kicking the seerctary New Hope's Ladies’ Sewing Circle ii the stomach. In passing on the case “The physical facts tend to disprove the charge. The evidence of the State was that Doctor Brooks, while standing erect, kicked backward, like a mule, and struck this lady in the stomach. Now, the prosceut- ing witness, Mrs. Albert Richardson, is not a tall lady, to be sure, but to have struck her in the stomach, kicking back ward that way, be must have clevated his foot far above a line consistent with the anatomical limitations even of an athletic young negro."—Kansas City Star. Justice Forgrave sa Stoncage, M.D.: yes, Vo AFRAID AN OPERATION IS NECESSARY. BUT THERE'S NOTHING TO FEAR. OUR MODERN METHODS—— SEXOLOGY Utnstrated) by William H. Walling, ALT, AL. Da. inxparts. ina cleat tam Should Have stand Showkl Have. vn Krowiedge a Young W. Raowledge a Young W Write lor "Sther Peopte Puritan Pub, Co., FOR_g MEN IGARS “MADE AT KEY WEST corr comicbooks.com