Life, 1914-01-29 · page 27 of 40
Life — January 29, 1914 — page 27: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"Osseous Travelers"** satirizes the Panama-Pacific Exposition's plan to exhibit Christopher Columbus's remains. The author humorously suggests that shipping Columbus's skeleton around America is actually a *benefit* to the dead explorer—a "vacation" breaking the monotony of eternal rest. The joke escalates absurdly: once Columbus's bones experience the excitement of Broadway and Chicago, they'll become too restless to settle peacefully back in their tomb, having "first-hand knowledge of all the wicked things they started" (likely referencing Columbus's colonial legacy). **"If Signs Were Taken Literally"** is a separate cartoon showing a bar entrance with signs for "Ales & Porter," "Domestic Beers," and "Family Entrance." It depicts people literally interpreting the "Family Entrance" sign—treating it as an actual family gathering place rather than just a bar entrance. The accompanying cartoon shows a wealthy man accidentally igniting a cigar backwards, with his companion praising his "luck" in discovering the mishap immediately. Both mock absurd literal interpretations.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Osseous Travelers 'HE latest addition to the Panama Exposition at San Francisco will be the bones of Christopher Columbus, which will be shipped on for purposes of exhibition. This is a new idea in expositions and cannot be too highly commended. It ought to give new life to the eminent bone industry, and be an incentive for all men to become great enough so that after they are gone they can still become world travelers. To go on a Cook’s tour a couple of hundred years after you have settled down and are waiting quietly and peacefully for the day of resurrection to come along, at least tends to break up the monotony. Almost anyone, under these circum- stances, falls into a rut. After you IF SIGNS WERE TAKEN LITERALLY have been reposing quietly in one spot for years, you don't care whether any- thing happens or not. New currency bills don’t interest you; a rise or fall in stocks or a new cugenic fad fail to excite you. It’s a good thing, there- fore, to be torn away from your mauso- leum and go on a vacation. It may not bring back the bloom to your cheeks, but it is a cheering process for any skeleton. We cannot help but wonder, however, how in the present instance the bones of Columbus will stand it. As they pass Broadway and possibly train through Chicago, will there not be a tendency to sit up and take notice? Will those bones of Columbus ever be able to settle down again with the first-hand knowledge of all the wicked things they started? ANDMADE—The millionaire man- ufacturer, “puew! 1 PUT THE LIGHTED END OF THAT CIGAR IN MY MOUTH!” “ HOW LUCKY YOU WERE, DEAR, TO DIS- COVER IT IMMEDIATELY.” comicbooks.com