Life, 1913-01-09 · page 45 of 100
Life — January 9, 1913 — page 45: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"The Spendthrift Family"** satirizes the excessive consumption of the wealthy elite. A family complains of poverty while possessing three limousines, a dozen butlers, hundreds of hats and gowns, eight strands of pearls, and fifteen homes combined. The joke mocks the absurd relativity of the rich—they feel deprived only because neighbors have *more*. This reflects early 20th-century anxieties about conspicuous consumption and the widening gap between the ultra-wealthy and everyone else. **"Turn About is Fair Play"** critiques the power imbalance at U.S. Customs. It argues that Custom House officers can wrongfully accuse and jail innocent passengers with no recourse, while officers themselves face no consequences for mistakes. The piece advocates for a Board of Appraisement (similar to one existing for goods) to hold government officials accountable. References to "Mr. Loeb" suggest a specific official, though identity is unclear from the text alone. The satire attacks unchecked government authority and lack of due process.
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b The Spendthrift Family NLY three limousines, mother, Only three limousines! Oh, the neighbors on our right and left Must think of us as sore bereft, And wonder what it means. Only a dozen butlers, father, A dozen—and no more, While the rich Van Sleets across the way, Have eighty working night and day, And twenty at the door. Only ten score of gowns, mother, To don the season through! 1 cannot wear out half the lot Though I should dance the turkey trot And the grizzly bear waltz, too! Only nine hundred hats, sister, Only these few chapeaur! Alack! that this should come to pass, Alack again, and then alas! For the season swiftly goes. Only eight strings of pearls, mother, Only eight strings of pearls, While Edythe Smart and Alyce Gold Have each a hundred, so I'm told— I am not like other girls! Only five country homes, father, And ten in the city, too! Our rich acquaintances, I'm sure, Must think that we are growing poor— Booh-hoo! booh-hoo! booh-hoo! Charles Hanson Towne. Turn About is Fair Play HERE is a Board of Appraise- ment in New York before which disputants who have brought in goods subject to duty lay their claims, and the Board decides upon the value of the goods. Why not have a similar Board, which shall be able to determine the degree of outrage which our courte- ous government bestows upon some of its respected citizens? At the pres- ent time—as one of the Custom House cfficers once told the writer—any in- coming passenger who objects to the treatment he receives, might just as well knock his head against a stone wall. SPEEDING THROUGH THE ELYSIAN FIELDS He has no recourse. He must submit or take the consequences, which may easily mean an imprisonment in jail. Now, it not infrequently happens that the Custom House officers make a mistake. They accuse an innocent per- son of being a thief. Why not, there- fore, make it an even thing all round? When the Custom House officer is guilty, why not put Mr. Loeb in jail for a few weeks? It is a poor rule that does not work both ways. The old axiom, “The king can do no wrong,” should not necessarily be applied to such a renowned democracy as ours. Even an honest man or wom- an who comes back home, should be permitted to get even when falsely ac- cused and maltreated by an over- zealous government. comicbooks.com