Life, 1912-04-18 · page 25 of 54
Life — April 18, 1912 — page 25: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"The Stowaway" cartoon** (left): Silhouette shows a figure climbing a building at night with a moon above. The accompanying text satirizes Congressional investigations, mockingly tallying their alleged outputs: over a million "facts," thousands of questions, and millions of words—yet concluding that conditions remain unchanged. The joke: Congress investigates exhaustively but accomplishes nothing; the "stowaway" represents their ineffectual work sneaking through without real impact. **"Making History"** parodies Paul Revere's midnight ride by having a constable permit him to exceed the speed limit once "to save the country," but warn future violations mean abandonment. It satirizes how rules bend for historical necessity, then revert—commentary on selective law enforcement or political expediency. The remaining items are lighter humor: a poem about romance at night, commentary that poor presidential quality results from voters' fallibility, and domestic banter about household needs—typical magazine filler content of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE STOWAWAY Those Investigations the present Congress doesn't do another thing throughout its entire istence, it is already entitled to our rlasting gratitude. It has investi- cd assiduously, and nothing that s unknown before is unknown now. order to be accurate, we have had r private statistician make a careful mpilation of the result to date. He finds that Congress has accumu- ted, and now has on tap, 1,001,385 cts, 21,982 suspicions, 6,365 discov- jes, 4,222,003 answers to questions, 7.324 questions without answers, 3.423 mistaken assumptions, 4,047 plans that will not be fulfilled, 8,228,387,101 words that will never be referred to again and 4,303,676 conditions that are just the same as they were before. Making History P UL REVERE was exceeding the speed limit. “You can do it this once to save the country,” said the local constable, “ but if this occurs again the country can go to the dogs.” Communion HO said the night w Lo, it can surely find My lover's heart! When all the hours of light T could not read it right So far apart! Who said the night was still? It is the throb and thrill OF ecstasy! Across the quiet streets How loud your passion beats Your thought of me! Who said the night was cold? it has a warmth untold By garish day, It teaches ev'ry hour Your love's great, wondrous pow'r So far away! Leolyn Louise Everett Better Presidents “THE Government” says Mr. Tatt, is not founded on the proposi- tion that the people in one expression or by one vote cannot make mistakes.” With this we are inclined to agree. If it were not true, it is altogether likely that we would have had a much better grade of Presidents. W! We need some new rugs. Husranp: Don't) we need lankets more? “Who sees blankets?” TYPOGRAPHICALLY SPEAKING “ CLOISTER AND PABST OLDSTYLE” comicbooks.com