Life, 1912-03-28 · page 41 of 50
Life — March 28, 1912 — page 41: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising**, not satire or political commentary. It contains four distinct ads: 1. **Kelly-Springfield Tires**: Claims superior mileage compared to competitors 2. **Evans' Ale**: A beverage ad using flowery, poetic language about refreshment 3. **Philip Morris Cigarettes**: Emphasizes pure Turkish tobacco and international manufacturing 4. **Patent services**: Victor J. Evans & Co. offering patent searches The only narrative content is "Mistaken Identity" (concluded from page 655), a story fragment about a ghost dictating literary advice to a character named Miss Flea, who ultimately rejects a publishing contract to join the Barnum and Bailey circus—the joke being she's the only human who never wrote for magazines. The page reflects early 20th-century consumer culture and advertising conventions. No political or social satire is evident.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Kelly- Springfield Automobile Tires The average mileage of Kelly-Springfield Tires is higher by a thousand or two than the aver- age tire’s average mile- age. And mileage is the most important thing you buy in tires. KELLY-SPRINGFIELD TIRE CO. 20 Vesey Street, New York Branch offices In New York, Chicago, Philadelphia, Boston, St. Lois. Detroit. Clncinnatl, San Francisco, Los Angelis, Cleveland, Baltimore, Washington, Seattle, AUanta. Akron, O., Buffalo. Boss iubber Co.. Dea ver. Colo. Appel & Burwell Rubber & Tire Com pany, Dallas, Texas. Rubber: 2. Mistaken Identity (Concluded from page 655) “That’s easy,” said the shade with a faint, superior smile. “I will dictate it. Ready.” “The art of expressing indefinably subtle shades of thought and emotion! That’s a jaw-breaker—what? But it takes you by the buttonhole and tells you what Hen is really doing, for he’s sure mastered that art. He's got it locoed, lassoed, thrown, and is sitting on it holding it down. He’s the mod- ernest thing in literary technique on the highway, has riparian rights to the Pierian Spring, has staked a claim on Parnassus and gone into the construc- A SIMPLE and GLORIOUS DRINK ORIGINAL LONDON Philip Morris Cigarettes The satisfying sensation from a “Philip Morris” is a regular revelation to the man who has classed all cigarettes as “just cigarettes"—to the man, also, who imagined no other compared with his “usual smoke.” The pleasing exhilaration affects the light and the heavy smoke alike. PURE TURKISH TOBACCO—in a class by itself for cigarettes, EXPERT BLENDING —in factories where cleanliness is the first commandment. A TIGHT CLEAN WRAPPER—the finishing touch to this cigarette masterpiece. It’s no wonder that “Philip Morris” has been put on every part of the map—that factories in New York, Montreal, London and Cairo, Egypt, running at full capacity, can hardly supply the demand. Different sizes produce different tastes—there are sufficient sizes of PHILIP MORRIS cigarettes to provide for every personal preference. CAMBRIDGE-2%in. - 25e AMBASSADOR-3%in. 35¢ MORISETTE—2i4in- } 28¢ BANQUET-Siin. - $1.00 BLUES—2%in. - + 30c Boxes of ten—Plain or Cork Tip Whether a connoisseur in cigarettes or uninitiated in its delights— you'll need but a few “draws” to appreciate the supreme luxury __ of “Philip Morris.” Where the dealer does not carry, we will gladly fill mail orders. PHILIP MORRIS COMPANY, Ltd. 417 W. Broadway, New York —one that brings to mortals the peace and fontent of the golden age. EVANS’ ALE is music, poetry and art” to the hu attuned toliquid rhapsody. Asreala jan soul t is ideal. Dealers or C. Il. EVANS & SONS, Hudson, N. Y. ATENTS "iwreh FEE RETURNED Send sketch for free search of Patent Office Records, Howto ain a Patest and What tolavest with list of Iaventions waa! fered for inventions sent free. Pat ts advertised free. of VICTOR J. EVANS & CO,, Washington, D.C. tion and building business right there as his many books attest.” “And now,” continued the ghost lay- ing a paper on the table, “If you will sign this contract, I shall be obliged. You see that it insures you real money and the best imitation laurels in stock.” “I appreciate your courtesy,” said Miss Flea, “but I fear you are too late. These manuscripts which you see here belong to my brothers and sisters. I have accepted an offer to-day to join the Barnum and Bailey aggregation of freaks as the only living human being who has never tried to write for the magazines.” Peace Commissioner Two persons requested Archidamus to act as arbitrator in a quarrel. “Will you swear to abide by my de- cision?” he asked. On their assent under oath he re- plied, “ Then I adjudge that you shall not leave this temple till you have made friends.”—Plutarch. comicbooks.com