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Life, 1911-10-12 · page 32 of 48

Life — October 12, 1911 — page 32: what you’re looking at

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Life — October 12, 1911 — page 32: Life, 1911-10-12

What you’re looking at

This page combines **satirical humor pieces** with **period advertisements**: The main satirical content includes: 1. **"Their Last Hour"** — A romantic parody mocking sentimental melodrama. A couple's tearful goodbye is undercut by absurd physical comedy (tears creating blisters, hair tickling noses). 2. **"Showing Him His Error"** — Brief dialogue satirizing anti-suffrage arguments, presenting a man's claim that women's suffrage "destroyed our natural timid [nature]" as obviously ridiculous. 3. **"According to Schedule"** — Humor about American tourists rushing through Europe on strict schedules, unable to appreciate destinations. The punchline: tourists confuse Venice with Florence because "Monday's Florence; Wednesday's Venice." 4. **"The Shame of Defeat"** — A mother's note excusing her son from school for contracting a "black eye." The advertisements (Weed Chains, Rad-Bridge, etc.) are typical period commercial content promoting automobile safety and agricultural products. The page reflects early 20th-century American life, automobiles, and emerging women's suffrage debates.

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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

HE BLACK CAR skidded! In a flash pleasure changed to peril. There were sounds of rending wreckage and snapping steel coupled with screams of terror. It makes one shudder to think what might have bappened had the trolley car not stopped. The driver had neglected to equip his car with Weed Anti-Skid Chains—he “took a chance.” Down the long, wet, slippery road he came, but at the tarn the rear wheels would not follow the front wheels—THEY SKIDDED! —tbhe car spun ‘round—quick as a flash It erahed hrongh. she fone and brought the occupants face to face with Death Pos euin slo occas aOR All Reputable Dealers The CAR came down the same road with speed unchecked and flashed around the sharp turn in perfect safet: ‘Tho rear w! jowed the front w! ‘exactly—they tracked true as flanged car wheels upon steel rails—ahide Gag wan ctterly impessibie becaese they were eqnigped with WEED 4nti-skid CHAINS Pi make SAFETY youre—take Weed Goa rt of Arpeals, Chicago, All others are infringements. WEED CHAIN TIRE GRIP CO., 28 Moore St., New York City | CONTEMPORA The Shame of Defeat “Dear Profe: a school r, when he ought to be day he contracted a bl; ashamed. " wrote a mother teach please excuse Freddi school. According to Schedule T. Lewis, the was talking lately 3,000-mile automobile trip he hac just made in Europe. “One secs Europe in an automobile, he said, “One really it. Som tourists don't you know. “Once, in Florence, I on the bridge over the Arno, in the beauty of the old when a half-dozen American at “They hurried by me, then consulting their watches, I overheard this conversa abou! sees drinkin: a tourist drew n k walk, every now ane and, a tion “*Well, Florence is “* Florence?’ “Why, yes! in?’ “Of course all right, sure This is Florence, not. This is Venice.’ “Oh, go on! It's Monday, and Monday’s Florence ; Venice’ "—Tit-Bits. GREAT BEAR SPRING WATE 8 GO cents per case of 6 glass stoppered bot |, OUR. FOOLISH ARIES Yester, well-known was standing Italian city, anyhow, Wednesday's oe Bridge we now reach the best For you It's the very best reason To buy ” Rad-Bridze" entire wavad Velosr cards, be. aed ake posipail, Sam Tene Gena than coat) we tend i he stamstand of the Ridge wer | DCLICFE & CO. 146 Peart 8t ct You of treason. PLAY Their Last Hour lovely The maiden shuddered invol- untarily and drew closer to her lover, A look of unuttcrable sadness stole over | her face and a tear-drop, welling from her ma zure cye, stole down her nose and le a blister on the young man’s clean white collar, | “Why are you so sad?" he murmured, | sneezin; as her wayward tresses tickled his left nostril, “T was thinking,” \ down a sob she said, and a marshmallow “that be our evening together until to-morrow.” | For truly, love hands us every caramel. —Mikeauk simul- | taneously, this will last a lime with News, Showing Him His Error Mr. N. Quire: What women mauling that man for? Mas. Hewat He saying that the suffrage stroyed our natural and robbed us of are those oT: insulted us by movement de timid all our gentleness Sun i Ox occasion, Governor “ Dick” Oglesby went down to Joliet to inspect one the state prison, and in one of the cells he found a very ugly man. “How did you get in here?" asked Oglesby * Abduct was the reply; “1 tried ecason, to run off with a girl, and they caught ardon you as soon id,” said the don’t see how you could other way.” [ get back wernor; expect to Ket a wife in any Irgonant INVESTORS READ La Wall Street Journal Caron Bitters—Unexcelled with Lemonade, Sherry and Whiskey. “I ‘Oct. C. Blache & Co., Ga | q 1» Soda ispensable for a perfect cocktail 8 Broad Y., Gen'l Distes, Cc L Be 1 on bos ; St. Regis Everbearing s The Raspberryfor the Million and the Millionaire “There's Millions tn It"’ You can now have wonderful rasp- berries from June to October by setting, out the plantsin the fall, St. Regis produces continuously from une to October— heavy crops of luscious, sugary berries of bright or, th av my in Grows successfully in any soil—cn- dures without injury heat, drought and severest cold, Catalogue free. GLEN BROTHERS, Glenwood SOBER PARAGON Mammoth, Sweet Chestnut Brackett. say appearance and excellent flavor. hestnuts ike This or Profit trees are Covers # 50. piece. wardy rapid, sym- Basket of Mantura Pecans Hardy Acclimated Pecan Trees for Planting in Northern States Here are Pecan thrive in Northern S se qualities combined end devel- by science to a degree that closely ders perfection, in the new Crop, Fall of 1910, brought $48.000, chard only 8 years old. The only large Sweet chestnut in cea which will tes — producing as prolifically and as profitably as any ¢ world. i Bears the second year. The nuts ff Southern Pecans, rerage 1 to. 2inchesin diameter. Pecan Orchards pay far bigger profts United 5 Pomologic. per acre than wheat or com Ie jet large © A shade-irce of wondrous the pride of the South, may now adom any Northern landsc We have five var best suited for Northern planting. These have withstood temperature far Testimony from growers, commi erchants, Forestry Experts, etc., our free booklet. We own, exclusive iven ve Soler Par "This | below zero,—never been known to cop righted Bl winter-kill” cessful in almost any attached to every SPL Reach cial genuine tree, Catalogue free. Nursery (Est’d 1886), 1822 Main St., Rochester, N. Y. ty in $ to 7 years. comicbooks.com <ea>"0ry