Life, 1910-04-28 · page 25 of 40
Life — April 28, 1910 — page 25: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page reproduces W.S. Gilbert's famous Victorian satirical ballad (a W.S. Gilbert work, likely from *Gilbert and Sullivan* fame). The poem is a darkly comedic tall tale about shipwreck survival. **The satire:** An old sailor recounts how his ship wrecked, leaving ten survivors who, starving, resort to cannibalism through lottery. Each victim is eaten in turn until only two remain—the cook and narrator. The cook persuades the narrator he's the better cook, then attempts to boil him. The narrator murders the cook first and eats him. **The joke for modern readers:** This is absurdist British humor—the elaborate, matter-of-fact recitation of increasingly horrific cannibalism, treated as mundane seafaring misfortune. The humor derives from the poem's formal, almost cheerful narrative tone applied to gruesome subject matter. The illustrations (a caricatured old sailor and classical figure) are typical *Life* magazine accompaniment to literary content. The 1893 *Life* magazine note calls it "the most humorous piece of verse in the English language"—Victorian audiences apparently found gothic absurdism hilarious.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Yarn of the Nancy Bell BY W. S. GILBERT (This ballad is a very old friend, and so familiar that we hesitate to gwe it, but we do so because it is considered by many critics to be the most humorous piece of verse in the English language.) 'Twas on the shores that round our coast From Deal to Ramsgate span That I found alone, on a piece of stone, An elderly naval man. His hair was weedy, his beard was long, And weedy and long was he, And I heard this wight on the shore recite In a singular minor key: “Oh, Tam a cook and a. captain bold, And the mate of the Nancy brig, And a bo's'n tight, and a midshipmit And the crew of the captain's gig And he shook his fists, and he tore his hair, Till T really felt afraid, For I couldn't help thinking the man had been drinking, And so I simply said: “O elderly man, it’s little T know Of the duties of men of the sea, And I'll eat my hand if T understand How you can possibly be “At once a cook, and a captain bold, And the mate of the Nancy brig. And a bo's'n tight, and a midshipmite, And the crew of the captain's gig.” Then he gave a hitch to his trousers, which Is a trick all seamen larn, And having got rid of a thumping quid He spun this painful yarn: “'Twas in the good ship Nancy Bell That we sailed to the Indian Sea, And there on a reef we come to grief, Which has often occurred to me. PRE: “And pretty nigh all the crew were drowned (There was seventy-six 'o soul), And only ten of the Nancy's men Said ‘Here!’ to the muster roll. “There was me, and the cook, and the captain bold, And the mate of the Nancy brig, And the bo’s'n tight, and a midship- mite, And the crew of the captain's gig. “For a month we'd neither wittles nor drink, Till a-hungry we did feel; So we drawed a lot, and accordin’ shot ' The captain for our meal. “The next lot fell to the Nancy's mate, Anda delicate dish he made; Then our appetite with the midshipmite We seven survivors stayed. “And then we murdered the bo's'n tight, And he much resembled pig; Then he wittled free, did the cook and me, On the crew of the captain's gig. “Then only the cook and me was left, And the delicate question, ‘ Which Oi us two goes to the kettle?’ arose, ‘And we argued it out as sich. “For I loved that cook as a brother, I did, And the cook he worshipped me; But we'd both be blowed if we'd either be stowed In the other chap’s hold, you see. ““T'M be eat if you dines of me, says fom “Yes that,’ says I ‘Vm. boiled if hl, Zxactly so,’ quoth he. ‘you'll be’; die, my friend,’ ys he, ‘Dear James, to murder me ‘Were a foolish’ thing to do, For don’t you see that you cant cook me, While 1 can—and will—cook you?’ “So he boils the water and takes the salt And the pepper in portions true (Which he never forgot), and some chopped shalot, And some sage and parsley, too “*Come here? with a proper pride, Which his smiling features tell, ‘'Twill soothing be if I let you see How extremely nice you'll smell.” ays he, “And he stirred it round and round and round, And he sniffed at the froth— When I ups with his heels, and smoth- ers his squalls, In the scum of the broiling broth. foaming 773 “ And I eat that cook in a week or less, And—as I eating be The last of his chops, why, I almost drops, For a wellse in sight I see. “And I never grieve, and I never smile, And I never larf nor play, But I sit and croak, and a single joke Thave—which is to say: “Oh, I am a cook, and a captain bold, And the mate of the Nancy brig, And a bo's’n tight, and a midshipmit And the crew of the captain's gig! THE FLIGHT OF AENEAS 18 ONE OF THE FIRST CARICATURES IT 18 A SATIRE ON THE FLIGHT OF YROM TROY, THE ORIGINAL, FROM mits KNOWN. AENEAS WHICH THE BURLESQUE PICTURE WAS DRAWN, | 18 GIVEN IMMEDIATELY ABOVE, comicbooks.com