Life — May 23, 1907 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LEGAL PLEA FOR HER HAND ‘The judge's daughter was perturbed. “Papa,” she said, knitting her pretty brow, “Iam in doubt as to whether I have kept to the proper form of procedure. In law one can err in so many little technicalities that Iam ever fearful. Now, last evening, George” ‘The judge looked at her so sharply over his glasses that she involuntarily paused. “T thought you had sent him about his business,” he said “I did hand down an adverse decision,” she answered, “and he declared that he would appeal. However, I convinced him that I was the court of last resort in a case like that, and that no appeal would lie from my decision.” “Possibly the court was assuming a Tittle more power than rightfully belongs to it.” said the judge, thoughtfully; “but let that pass. What did he do then?” “He filed a petition for a rehearing.” “The usual course,” said the judge; “but it is usually nothing but a mere formality.” “So I thought,” returned the girl, “and I was prepared to deny it without argument, but the facts set forth in his petition were sufficient to make me hesitate and wonder whether his case had really been properly presented at the first trial.” “Upon what grounds did he make the application ? the judge. scowling “Well,” she replied, blushing a little, “you see he proposed by letter, and his contention was that the case was of that peculiar character that cannot be properly presented by briefs, but demands oral arguments. ‘The fact that the latter had been omitted, he held, should be held an error, and the point was such a novel one that T consented to let him argue it. ‘Then his argument was so forceful that I granted his petition, and consented to hear the whole case again. Do you think "— “1 think,” said the judge, “that the court favors the plaintiff.” heicago Post ked BEAUTIES OF OUR LANGUAGE ‘wo members of the Princeton faculty, according to Harper's Weetly, during a recent hurried trip to New York, were oa a Broadway car when it was stopped by a blockade. As they were near their destination, they decided to get out and walk. The block was, however, soon lifted, and the car overtook them. “When we left the car," said one of the “highbrows," who, by the way, has a bit of the Celt in him, “I thought we should get on better by getting off. But, after all, we should have been better off if we had stayed on.” THE MEASURE OF HIS SUCCESS Hicks: Your friend Marryat tells me he's got his wife pretty thoroughly trained now. Wicks: Yes, he's got her trained so that he can make her do pretty nearly anything she wants to do.—The Catholic Standard and Times HOW HE PROPOSED Mr. McDootey: yez, me darlin’. Muss Ciancey: Pfwat is it, Pat?” “Whin it comes toime fer me funeral, how would yez loike U be tht Widder McDooley?"—Chicago News. Faith, an’ it do be a question Oi have fer ‘Tiere doctors in Kalamazoo were holding a consultation. ‘They looked the patient over thoroughly and well, expending fully ten minutes’ time diagnosing the case with care. ‘Then they retired to an adjoining room, closed the door, and a somewhat heated argument followed. One of the doctors thought the man had money; two were sure he hadn't, ‘They did not operate — Philistine. THERE WAS A YOUNG ARTIST NAMED SAM, WHO THOUGHT THE ART CRITICS A SHAM. SAID ME, “ULLY cre! 11's FASY To SEE YOR ME THEY DON'T CARE A—STRAW.” ERROR OF PEACE Peace had floated into a convention, thinking it one held in honor of the olive branch. Haying listened to the conversation awhile, it grew restive. Presently it flew away. “Great Scott!” it exclaimed. “Who was it steered me against the D. A. R.?"—Philadelphia Ledger. ‘Tux Comte de Narbonne, the friend whom Talleyrand loved the best—if he loved any one—was walking with him and re- citing some verses when Talleyrand perceived a passer-by yawning. “Look, Narbonne,” said he to his friend, “you are speaking too loud."—Bellman. ARMY KICKS Said an old Colonel up at West Point: “Our Army is all out of joint; When they make a B. ‘They never take me, But instead some young Captain appoint.” Said another one down at Monroe: “Do you think our dear Congressmen know ‘That our small Army pay Is no bigger to-day ‘Than it was thirty-five years ago?” —Harper's Weekly Nor ina thousand years will blood forget blood, even in this ‘great nation of ours The column had been winding all morning through opea country. Now it was appronching close woodland and high grass. The captain of the company, acting as advance guard, knew that trouble was probably lying ahead. He called to him his pet sergeant—the man he had been saving through all the day for the time when a “best™ man was needed. “Sergeant O'Hara,” he said, “1 want you to pick out from the company any six men you choose and go ahead as a point. You can have anybody you want—only choose the best you know. I think we will be fired on from those low hills.” Sergeant O'Hara's eyes searched the company. “Sullivan!” he called, “McCarty! O'Donnell! Moriarty! McGinniss!” He hesitated. His glance wandered uneasily up and down the line. Big, honest Swedes, burly Teutons, lanky Yankees, there were in plenty. But where—oh, yes, there on the left of the line—that bright-eyed, pug-nosed, red-headed little beggar, nodding and imploring attention with his twisted. upface. ‘The sergeant’s brow cleared. Lynch!" he called, with a sigh of relief. “This is thim, sorr,” he added, turning to the captain.—Owting. A Wasuixcton chemist said of the noted Dr. H. G. Wiley, of the Department of Agriculture: “Dr. Wiley has all his life been a stickler for pure food and pure food laws. “Once, when he was State Chemist of Indiana, a man put upa game on him. He was at this time fighting against olco, and the man, inviting him to a Washington Birthday dinner, had oleo of a very fine grade served with the hors d'eurre “Dr. Wiley, suspecting nothing, ate of the oleo freely, and his host said: “*How do you like the butter, sir?" Excellent,’ said Dr. Wiley. ‘One can fairly taste the rich, pure cream in it.’ The host gave a loud laugh *Oleo!" he said. "You've been cating oleo, man, and you never knew it.’ Dr. Wiley retorted with a calm smile: Since the most expert of us can be so easily deceived, there’s all the more need of the strictest laws against impure foods.""—Washington Star. Now that he has become a duly qualified member of the Ananias Society, it is generally believed that Mr. Harriman will at once proceed to acquire a majority of the stock Richmond Times-Dispatch Lire is published every Thursday. Postal Union, $1.04 a year extra from date of publication, 25 cents. Live is for sale by all Newsdealers in Great Britain. Jing, Chancery Lane, London, E. C., England, Aci 37 Avenue de Opéra, Paris. $5.00 a year in advance. ‘Single current copies, 10 cents. 18 Postage to foreign countries in the _ Saarbach's » Back oumbers, after three months News Exchange, 9 Rue St. Geor Saarbach’s News Exchange, Mayence, ‘The International News Company, Breams ‘ews Exchange, 1, New Coventry Street, Leicester Square, W., London; Saarbach’s es, Paris; Saarbach’s News Exchange, 1, Via Firenze, Milan: many, No contribution wal be returned unless accompanied by stamped and addressed envelope. The illustrations in Lire. are copyrighted and are not to be reproduced. 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