Life, 1903-12-11 · page 13 of 20
Life — December 11, 1903 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains **three separate satirical pieces** mocking early 1900s American society: 1. **"Ulysses" (top illustration)**: University-educated women violently disrupting a wedding, tearing apart the bride's gown as "souvenirs." The satire targets educated women activists—likely suffragists or social reformers—portraying them as destructive and unladylike. The joke: ordinary women would endure hardship to educate their daughters after witnessing this spectacle. 2. **"Failure" (brief exchange)**: A contributor's poem is so poorly written that even an editor "understands" it perfectly—implying it's meaningless drivel. 3. **"Development" (main text)**: A longer satirical story mocking religious hypocrisy in governance. Corrupt politicians and military leaders pray and cite scripture before pursuing theft and conquest. The satire critiques how religion became performative cover for immoral business and imperial practices, with ministers celebrating violence as righteous. The page attacks educated women activists, literary pretension, and especially the weaponization of religion to justify greed and war.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Illustrated. HE advantage, to the gentler sex, of liberal education was never more signally illustrated. The police were beating back the ordinary women without difficulty, ‘and the bridal party had almost reached the door of the church, when the Societas Universitatam Alumnaram, mostly by consistent line bucking, broke through, tore off the bride's gown, divided it into son- venirs, and retired with their familiar yell. Many of the ordinary women were heard to say that they would send their daughters throagh college if it took a leg. Failure. YONTRIBUTOR : Do you under- “stand that poem of mine? Macazixe Epitor: Perfectly. CONTRIBUTOR (sadly) : Well, U1 have ULYSSES. TUE SUITORS TRYING THY PRESIDENTIAL BOW. Development. [T was the day after the millennium, - Religion had not only been intro- duced into the public schools, but also into everything else. “Gentlemen,” said the magnate to his associates, “ we have an important day before us. There is a smaller and weaker rival of ours, with a good round sum in his possession, that I hope to relieve him of before night fa But, before the business of the d. gins, we will have the usual serv: The members of the State Legisla- ture paused before they took up the law that gave away the practice of all the principal cities to a chosen band, to make as much money out of as possible. “Let us first,” said the chairman, ‘in obedience to the law, read a few chapters of the Bible, and after that I will lead in prayer. These proceedings must be regular.” The bugle note had just been sounded, announcing to the army of the Republic that that small people about to be assimilated were waiting to have their throats cut, when the General in chief stepped to the front. “In accordance with our prevailing custom," he observed, lifting his finger over the hymn book, ‘Divine service is now in order.” The following Sunday, the most popular minister in the land, in lec- turing upon our great victory, said: ““My beloved brethren, there was a time when, degenerate beings that we were, we even hesitated about having religion in our schools. As if the leading people in the world could afford to be without it !” Tom Masson. ** (YET thee behind me, Satan,” said the Alderman. ‘That's where my hand is.” HE proof of the plumbing is in the heating. comicbooks.com