Life — July 14, 1898 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

always calls a great gun of the profes- sion, agrees to his opinions, and poi- sons with authority. His purses are mature, pious, and chemically pure; his undertakers models of well regu- lated anguish, The Solemn Ass can be found in art, literature, commerce, science—in fact, in all the departments of human activity outside of politics and the Tenderloin. He is the same interesting, joyous, guileless, stimulating, delightful, un- selfish creature everywhere, and is, besides, a conservative force in a lax and bibulous civilization, Joseph Smith, A Calculating Wife. [> X-SERVANT: My husband’s been beatin’ me again, Miss Mary, and I'd twenty minds to have him arrested. Miss Mary: Why didn’t you ? “Well, I was thinkin’, too, with me so lameand him not workin’, how'd I ever get the money to pay the fine !” T is not what we have learned that we know; it is what we have guessed. ITH men love is an affection of the eyes; with women, of the ears, SCY DON’T think Stuffer likes to sit at the dinner with such a pretty girl.” “Why not ?” “Tt distracts his attention.” SIR LANCELOT. An Arctic Explorer. AM a man of iron will And perfect fearlessness ; T set out boldly toward my goal, Resolved to win success. That goal which no man yet bas reachod Of all who dared to start, The coldest spot in all the earth— I mean Clorinda’s heart. All scbhomes that mortal could deviso I summoned to my aid; For years, o'er every obstacle I triumphed undismayed. But, though right manfully and well I strove to do my yrrt, The ice I found impassable Around Clorinda’s heart, THE HUMAN TATR. Cornelia E, Green.