Life, 1895-11-21 · page 13 of 18
Life — November 21, 1895 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several unrelated satirical pieces typical of 1890s humor: **Top illustration**: A carriage scene mocking wealthy European horse imports, referencing an October 1895 Horse Paper article. The satire suggests buyers should verify imported thoroughbred sires are legitimate, not just accept pedigrees—implying fraud in the horse trade. **"Proof Positive"**: A college graduate jokes he'll prove his cleverness by living idly on inherited income rather than working—satirizing wealthy young men's laziness and financial incompetence. **"A Frank Physician"**: Dr. Whittemore's affidavit hilariously admits he certified a death without knowing the cause and barely remembers the patient, mocking medical negligence and unethical documentation. **"A Cautious Lover"**: A son admits giving his fiancée a fake diamond, planning to provide a real one only after marriage—satirizing deceptive courtship practices among the affluent. **Bottom quip**: Jokes that even "dudes" (wealthy idlers) occasionally display intelligence, like the Duke of Brokeboro ordering "green-back ducks" (possibly a pun on currency/actual ducks).
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“ MANY IMPORTED THOROUGHBRED SIRES REACH THIS MARKET YEARLY FROM ALL PARTS OF EUROPE. Tene IT WOULD BE ADVISABLE, PERHAPS, TO REQUIRE BEFORE INVESTING—DESIDES THE PEDIGREES—ALL POSSIBLE GUARANTEES AS TO SOUNDNESS, CONFORMATION, ACTION, GAIT, ETC., ETC., ETC.”—Horse Paper, Oct., '95. contained nothing but a black yawning hole instead of the fire, which one of the characters was supposed to poke. “Honour” is certainly interesting, especially when one considers the difficulty of making its intensely German atmosphere in- telligible on the American stage. Metcalfe. PROOF POSITIVE. LADYS: What are you going to do when you leave college? Tom: Oh, live on my income, I guess. GLapys: A man as clever as you might do something to prove his cleverness, Tom: Living on my income would prove me one of the cleverest finan- ciers of the age. A FRANK PHYSICIAN. HE following is extracted from an affidavit made by Dr. N. K. Whittemore, of Elk River, Minn., ina recent law suit: ‘This is to certify that Sarah Langen, supposed to be single, died on Feb. 8, 1895. I have no memorandum stating just the cause of death, and I have had more to think about in caring for the living than thinking about the dead. However, I am quite certain that she is dead, and have certified to that fact at least once before. She was a patient of mine, and that ought to at least give me authority to know whereof I speak, and possibly that ought to be sufficient guarantee that she is dead.” Isn't frankness like this a violation of the medicated code of ethics ? A CAUTIOUS LOVER. FATHER: Did Rebecca know dot tiamond vos not shenuine ? Son: of der von I vould give her ven we vos really married. At vonce, fader. But I told her it vos only a copy T was doubtless absent-mindedness on his part, but it is said to be true, that the Duke of Brokeboro ordered a pair of green-back ducks for dinner the other night. S there are exceptions to all rules, some dudes must have brains.