Life — April 5, 1894 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

*LIFE: 229 JUSTICE. And when at Heaven's gate she applied Tre saleswoman’s form was like this, St. Peter would not let her in. The saint, with a sneer, said, “Not here, For lying’s considered a sin, Which to sanction we cannot begin.” The saleswoman answered, “ Those lies Are on the wrong list, sir—and so A liar, esteemed saint, I ain't, ‘Tis the firm who should go down below.” And the Saint answered justly “ That's s Jessie M. Wood. SAFE FROM THE AUTOGRAPH FIEND. OND MOTHER (fo teacher): Don't you think my boy is bound to make mark ? HER: I am afraid so, It seems ssible for him to learn to write. MIDNIGHT CIVILITIES. RS. BROWN (nudging Mr. Brown, who snores with his mouth open): William! you'd make less noise if you'd keep your mouth shut! Mr. BRowN (only half awake): So'd you! And the saleswoman sold, so I'm told, Gowns from Paris by Worth and Elise, Made charmingly, just as you please. And the saleswoman's duty was this: To put on the gowns, and to say, With a sweet, honeyed smile, “Here is style,” “Twill suit you in every way.” (Such lies she would tell every day.) So the gowns were all rapidly sold, And the dollars came rapidly in, A PROPER TIME FOR EVERYTHING. And it can’t be denied that she lied, “IP YOU WISH TO RETAIN YOUR SITUATION, MR. PIPER, IT WILL BE NECESSARY Which in business is not thought TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO YOUR PERSONAL APPEARANCE. YOu LOOK aS THOUGH YOU HAD NOT SHAVED FOR A WEEK." a sin, as * But I AM RAISING A BEARD, SIR.” my” ‘« —But one day the saleswoman “THAT'S NO EXCUSE, SIR. YOU MUST DO THAT SORT OF THING OUTSIDE OF died! RUSINESS HOURS.”