Life, 1891-02-12 · page 5 of 14
Life — February 12, 1891 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Page 95 of Life Magazine - Analysis **"A Terrible State of Affairs"** (top left): A druggist at a counter addresses a young girl about missing Valentine's cards and money. The joke satirizes the commercialization of Valentine's Day—the concern is purely financial ("how much a pound is your dead-list fixed"), not romantic sentiment. **"A Valentine"** (center): A poem by James G. Burnett expressing reluctance to send a Valentine due to prior commitment. **"A Select Affair"** (right): This criticizes the Metropolitan Museum's Sunday hours policy. The satirist notes the irony that the museum is closed to the general public (working people who need it most) on Sundays but open only to privileged members—contradicting stated "religious principles" of the trustees who exclude the very people who deserve access.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A TERRIBLE STATE OF AFFAIRS. Druggist: WELL, MY LITLLE LADY, WHAT CAN I DO FOR You? ZL. L.: OUR FELLERS HAS ALL GONE BACK ON US AND DIDN'T SEND US NO WALENTIMES, AND WE WANT TER KNOW HOW MUCH A POUND IS YOUR DEAD- LIEST PIZEN, FOR WE DON'T CARE ABOUT LIVIN’ NO LONGER ! A VALENTINE, O send a heart as others do, I know is fitting at this season ; And I would gladly send one too, Except for one important reason. For even if I surely knew That if I did I would repent it, I would to-day send mine to you, If I had not—already sent it. James G. Burnett. “AFTER THE OLD MASTERS.” A SELECT AFFAIR. ) a is a pretty hard joke on the working man, but it shows the officers of the Metropoli- tan Museum have an active sense of humor. Although this hospitable building is closed against the public on Sunday, it is always open on that day toa favored few. All the officers of the institution, fellows, founders, etc., are ad- mitted with their friends and families by special cards, But the public, the working people, those who most need it and can only come on this day, are they also admitted by special card? Oh, no! They are told, with all the emphasis that a front door can give, to go to the devil and mind their own business. And while this is done from a deep religious motive, the favored ones are strolling about inside with plenty of elbow room enjoying the works of art. They have it all to themselves. What fun it must be! And what a hilarious joke on the crowd outside who are excluded by the religious principles of the trustees!