Life, 1888-02-09 · page 5 of 16
Life — February 9, 1888 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Life Magazine Page 75 **"Plutus versus Cupid"** is a humorous poem about a modern Juliet whose Romeo lacks wealth—he can't even afford romantic gestures. The joke: despite being poor, he's confident enough to declare himself worth a million and marry her anyway. **"A Beautiful Case"** mocks medical jargon: a doctor describes a broken bone with theatrical enthusiasm, calling thirteen fractures "beautiful." **"A Great Uprising"** appears to be political satire about citizens and soap-related social upheaval, though the specific reference is unclear. The remaining items—**"Those Nickel Machines,"** **"A Prudent Coal Dealer,"** and **"Dramatic Note"**—are brief comedic anecdotes about everyday annoyances (beggars, heating costs) and theatrical gossip. This page reflects turn-of-century American concerns: poverty, class, medical pretension, and urban life.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
PLUTUS VERSUS CUPID. HE was a modern Juliet, Whom Romeo was wooing ; Though they had less ado to get Their billing and their cooing. He didn’t scale a garden-wall, Nor sigh, nor look demented, Nor vow she was his all-in-all, And tease till she relented. I blush for him ; it would be so In any book or story, And then her pa would tell him “Go!” Then death—in search of glory. But not so he. Upon my life, His point the rascal carried : “I’m worth a million ; be my wife,” Said he—and now they're married ! A. E. Hoyt. A BEAUTIFUL CASE. ATIENT (who has met with an ac- cident): Is it a bad fracture, doctor ? DocTor (a surgical, enthusiast): Bad? Why, it’s beautiful, sir, beautiful! The bone is broken in not less than thirteen places! A GREAT UPRISING. FELLow Citizens! The time will soon arrive, if it ain’t already arrove, when this mad craze for soap which has seized upon the people and is sweepin’ the length and breadth of the land, bring- in’ desolation to our once happy homes, will have to be met by vigorous and determined action. \PEARS Soap | ORY SOAP) \ Fellow citizens! Ef sunthin’ of this sort ain’t done we shall be washed out of existence, or go about without no skin like a roar beefsteak, Fellow citi- zens! To be sperimented on by every noo brand of soap robs life of all its charms and makes existence itself unin-doo-ra-bull! I hev spoke. Chollie: BUT DON'T YOU THINK THEY'RE A LITTLE-ER LOUD, ISAACSENS? Ssaacsens: Lout! LouT! DaT WAS DER BUDY OF DOSE CLODINGS. DEY SHPEAK RIDE OUT FOR DEMSELFES. THOSE “NICKEL” MACHINES. AGLEY : | wonder why this infernal beggar is always waiting on the corner as I come out of the office ? GAGLEY : He wants you to drop a nickel, so you can see him go. A PRUDENT COAL DEALER. AGLEY: By Jove, Skinnem, I can’t see why you don’t keep your office warmer. SkINNEM: Can't afford to; coal’s too high. GAGLEY : But it’s just the same when coal is cheap. SKINNEM: Oh, I don’t make anything then, and have to economize. UDGING from the veracity of recent European news, despatches should be known as “cabal messages,” or the mails should be sent by the Canard Line. DRAMATIC NOTE. AGGIE MITCHELL appeared at the Walnut Street Theatre, in Philadelphia, last week. Miss Mitchell is becoming so sensitive that she refused to play at the Chestnut.