Life, 1886-02-04 · page 12 of 16
Life — February 4, 1886 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Life Magazine Page 82: Political Satire This page contains two satirical pieces mocking American politics and social hypocrisy. **Upper Section ("Victoria and the Pope Were Flirting"):** A dialogue set in what appears to be a wax museum (Eden Musée), featuring American historical/political figures—references to Presidents Hayes, Polk, Tyler, Jefferson, Washington, and Arthur. The satire ridicules politicians complaining about cramped conditions and indignities (one figure jokes about being labeled "M. Pasteur" by the boss). The joke critiques how these supposedly great men are reduced to static displays, uncomfortable and powerless—a metaphor for politicians' actual irrelevance or compromised positions. **Lower Section ("Grief"):** A brief comedic dialogue between a daughter and mother about mourning Aunt Sophy's death. The cruel punchline: the mother reveals they're actually *pleased* because the required mourning period saves money on entertaining guests during winter—exposing Victorian hypocrisy about grief and social obligation. Both pieces target pretension and moral dishonesty in American society.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
(82 hearing Hayes wonder where his hens are, and Jimmy Polk asking Tyler to move over and give him more room, the way T have,” “Idon't, eh? President fellows ? I suppose that is n't me in there with you I have to do double duty, and that’s VICTORIA AND THE POPE WERE FLIRTING, what's the matter. There aren't clothes enough around here to fit all of me. In that political atmosphere with you I'm roasted to death, while out here I’m dying with the cold. This Eden Musée management don't strike a decent average on clothes, Jefferson, and that’s cold fact.” “ You golong. You're the Father of your country, and can stand it. I’m not even an uncle, and have to stand there listen- ing to all sorts of comments from all sorts of people. The other day a Democrat stopped in front of me and commenced to talk of Jeffersonian simplicity. Says the Democrat : * He is a simple-looking old galoot, isn't he, Jim?’ ‘Simple,’ says Jim; ‘simple ’stoo mild. Say idiotic!" And I could n’t kick the man without taking off my leg. This I could stand, too ; *LIFE: but when the boss came along last night and stuck a pair of red whiskers on me and labeled me the famous Inoculist, M. Pasteur, I thought the climax was capped.” This was too harrowing to listen to, and I sought diversion in the Chamber of Horrors. There the horse thief was rest- ing his neck while in pleasant converse with his slayers, who had humanely placed a step-ladder beneath his feet. The settler whom the Indian was scalping was complaining that this was the longest hair cut he ever had, and while the de- capitated individual was explaining to me that he was confused and had lost his head, a gong rung and the whole company congealed once more into tableaux. When I left, the baptism had been resumed, Napoleon had begun his arduous labors as a corpse, and the originator of the Declaration had let his jaw drop and resumed his Jeffersonian simplicity once again. Washington started off for another day’s cruise over the Delaware and ex-President Arthur’s complaints at having but a single suit of clothes per day were hushed. As the door.closed behind me I heard the horse thief apply to the management for a new neck, and the decapitated gentleman was discharged for refusing to remove his head. Carlyle Smith. CONSISTENCY. ft gst Sun of Friday chides the Sua of Thursday for printing two despatches in regard to Gens. Grant and Halleck, and casts doubt upon their genuineness. This reminds us of the man who soliloquized thus: I'm a liar, and I can prove it! Daughter : 1 AM SO SORRY TO BE GOING BACK TO TOWN FOR THE WINTER, WE WERE SO NICELY FIXED OUT THERE; AND THEN AuNT Sopiy's DEATH, AND ALL. Mamma: \t 18 YOUR AUNT SOPHY'S DEATH, DEAR, THAT ENABLES US TO SPEND THE WINTER IN TOWN, BEING IN MOURNING WE ARE NOT EXPECTED TO ENTERTAIN AND CAN DO IT UP CHEAPLY.