Judge, 1927-01-08 · page 23 of 36
Judge — January 8, 1927 — page 23: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains satirical humor and period advertisements from an early 20th-century American magazine. **"New Year Resolutions" Satire:** The left column presents parallel husband and wife resolutions for the new year, humorously illustrating marital discord. The husband's resolutions (bringing trinkets home, attending shows, remembering anniversaries) are identical to the wife's *goals for changing him*—suggesting these promises are perpetually broken. The joke mocks both husbands' inability to follow through on domestic commitments and wives' resigned acceptance of this pattern. **"In 1990" Joke:** A collector seeks rare Venus radiator cap ornaments from early American cars. The dealer indicates extreme scarcity, but the collector dismisses cheaper alternatives. The humor lies in the absurdity: treating mass-produced car ornaments as fine art objects worthy of serious collecting. **Bottom Joke:** A father claims he stopped believing in dreams after marriage—a cynical quip about matrimony destroying youthful idealism. The page is primarily advertising (Reymer's candy, Raybestos brake products), with these jokes interspersed as filler content typical of Judge's format.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The New Year Resolutions of a Husband Te refrain from dropping ashes all over the rug in the living-room. To let the guest towel adorn the bathroom, always remembering that its function is beauty, not utility. ‘To bring some little trinket home for the wife at least once every couple of nights. To suggest taking in a show or a movie two or three evenings a week. ‘To remember his wife’s birthday and their wedding anniversary. The New Year Resolutions of a Wife To teach her husband not to drop ashes all over the rug in the living- room, To conclusively impress upon her husband's mind the fact that the guest towel in the bathroom is there for beauty, not utility. ‘To get her husband to the point where he will bring some little trinket home to her at least once every couple of nights. To force the old stay-at-home to take her to a movie or a show two or three evenings a week. To educate him to the point where her birthday and their wedding an- niversary will be duly and ceremoni- ously remembered. — Hugh Wood In 1990 Cottrctor—Can you get me a Venus? Dealer—Why, that’s impossible. You must realize that they are not to be had for the asking. Besides, the last one sold brought a fabulous price. “Get me one. Money is no ob- ject.” “Tl try, but you must remember that there are but four known to be in existence. I can get you a Min- lent condition.” “TI know of a Diana that can be obtained for two hundred, a good Mercury for half that and—” “They will not do. I must have a Venus to complete my collection of early American radiator cap orna- ments.” Bill Sykes Rad “Do you believe in dreams, dad- dy?” asked Jinks’s little son. “TI used to,” replied Jinks, “until | I married one.” —Tit-Bits ee | that little extra touch of enchanting quality choose Stores approved as 6 ) Reymer Agencies | are supplied direct from Reymers’— ensuring freshness and careful hand- ling. Dealer in- quiries invited. MADE BY REYMER & BROTHERS. INCORPORATED, PITTSBURGH. That Good Pittsburgh Candy” Yow’re Safe With Raybestos IN Raybestos you have a factor of safety beyond price. Under no circumstances, risk your life nor your car with cheap lining or a substitute for genuine Raybestos. THE RAYBESTOS COMPANY, Bridgeport, Conn. The Canadian Raybestos Cc Raybestos-Belaco, Ltd., London, England. 'd., Peterborough, Ont. There is a Raybestos Brake Service Station in Your Vicinity. 2 comicbooks.com