Judge — December 19, 1925 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

; An Air Raid “(er station PUN,” Bertha said as I fiddled with the dials. “They always put on an interesting program.” And this is what hap- pened: “Good evening, all you folks out there. We are about to take the air with a vurry-vurry lovely pro- gram. I hope you'll like it. This is D. G. F. announcing for station PUN, operated by the ‘Wise Cracker Company,’ of Brooklyn, N. Y., manufacturers of those vurry-vurry wunnerful little dog biscuits, the kind puppies cry for. “This first number on our vurry- vurry maahveluss program being broadcasted to-night through station PUN, the ‘Wise Cracker Co.,’ Brook- lyn, N. Y., will be ‘The Biscuit Boys’ in a suite of vurry-vurry clevah little songs, the first being, ‘I Asked Her to Hold My Hand and She Gave Me Lady Fingers.’ This is station PUN, the ‘Wise Cracker Co.,’ Brooklyn, N. Y., manufactur- ers of refined cookies and substantial oysterettes. Now we will hear ‘The Biscuit Boys’ sing one of their vurry- vurry remahkable little numbahs. Please stand-by for a minute while ‘The Biscuit Boys’ finish chewing the vurry-vurry delicious ‘Marsh- mallow Mellows,’ manufactured ex- clusively by the ‘Wise Cracker Co.,” of Brooklyn, N. Y., which they al- ways eat before singing to sweeten their voices. Is that right boys? The boys say yes. Now you will hear them sing a vurry-vurry in- turesting little numbah entitled (what’s the name of that song, boys? What? ‘Brown Eyes Why Are You Blue?’) entitled ‘Oui, Oui We Need a Biscuit.’ “This is station PUN, the ‘Wise Cracker Co.,’ Brooklyn, N. Y. D. G. F. announcing. All right boys, let ‘er go. Before the boys t started, for the benefit of those who just happened to tune in, this is station PUN, the ‘Wise Cracker Co.,’ Brooklyn, N. Y., broadcasting direct from our daylight factory where we manufacture the best in cookiedom for people who care. The noise you hear is the turning of the ponderous wheels of the machinery that mixes the dough that is being made by this advertising— er, I should say, that mixes the dough that is being made into the many, many mahvelus biscuits, cook- ies and crackers that are so vurry- vurry deelishius. “Ask your dealer for ‘Wise Crackers,’ the Kind Mother Wishes She Made. This is station PUN the ‘Wise Cracker Co.,’ Brooklyn, N. Y., broadcasting direct. from their day- light factory, the music of their vur- ry-vurry wunnerful quartet, “The Biscuit Boys’ in a suite of songs, the first being ‘Where’s My Sweet, Sweet Cookie To-night?? D.G. F. announcing for station PUN, the ‘Wise Cracker Co.,’ Brooklyn, N. Y. “Yes, indeed,” I said turning to Bertha and turning off the radio, “Station PUN certainly does put on an interesting program.” Carroll SaLeswoman—You know Bargin’s store serves tea every afternoon. CustomMEr—Five o'clock? “No, 4.48 o'clock.” new expressions: ‘Financy Translation: If Myrtle says to you, “Jackie just bought a Rolls- Royce.” You snap right back with “Financy that!” —p— We hate to appear “What the young men will wearish” but as our old college chum Beaunash would say, “The tendency of the young man about town this season is to wear a soft shirt with his dinner clothes.” —p— And our famous “Ear to the Ground Department” has discovered one of the reasons why the YMAT goes out to dine in a soft shirt. With so many costume balls going on the aforesaid YMAT may decide to go at the last moment and what does he do? “T’ll bite,” say you. je He takes his girl’s eyebrow pencil, blackens his eyebrows and gives him- self a mustache, uses his colored muffler for a turban, removes his coat and vest, throws his soft shirt open at the neck and presto! He’s a pirate! = Or, by wrapping the muffler around his waist, he’s a Spanish Don Juan! Take your cherce; and all this can be done in a taxi on the way to the ball! Ain’t this a wonderful age we're living in! —>— N. B. No change in the “Six Best Steppers” this week. GoD comicbooks.com