Judge — May 30, 1925 — page 23: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

If the Public Speaker Bared Hlis Inmost Thoughts Y FRIENDS, I am happy to be with you to-night. Lought to he. I'm getting and expenses. 1 wanted $100; but maybe I can pad the expenses, First of all, 1 want to tell you that I never laid eyes on a homelier set of women in my life. Are they models for Tad and Goldberg? Gentlemen, T know you must have just lovely times at your stag parties, Me zation have no ambition nor ) sense of getup to them, This building in which we are gathered to-night is sufficient evidence of the manner in which they go about things. The monstrosity of its tecture is exeeeded only by the number of mort is burdened, You should choose better leaders— men of progress and foresight. Why, if you only knew it, you are the laughing stock of the rest of the order, with your big time aspirations a rover, the men of this orga chi- ages with which it and your small town realities, Most of iny speech to-night. is trite stuff, Pl but what am I to do with an audience like this? I shall, of course, commend you volubly upon having reached. this nth milestone of your existence; Imt the wonder is that you in this organization have survived the ordeal of propinquity for so lengthy a period. In closing T shall render that classic of epics—"Casey at the Bat. Anything deeper would) go miles “What's the charge, officer?” “She was Uocking traffic by being modestly dressed.” “Remanded to Bellecue for obsercation!” “Yep. thema esthetic dancers from the city. Every spring they | come out and do all my sowing fer nothing while practicing new steps above your heads. Besides it's the only thing T know by heart. A little so-called poetry at the end of a speech and the dinner guests always yo home saying to one another, “What a wonderful memory that man aust have! And from the antiquity of the jokes I have inter spersed throughout my messag this evening I am inclined to bel f so myself. At your next s| sary T hupe to he vor gatherings that [shall be deaf to your entreaties to be with you unless you raise the ante to 100 iron men. You will exeuse my leaving ificant anniver far away frou carly. A couple of the visiting brothers have arranged a real party at the hotel. R.A. P.