Judge — November 10, 1923 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

South View of the Belle Meade Country Club, Nashville, Tenn. TOLD AT THE 19th HOLE ENEAS Brown had been arrested on charges of assault and battery. rent you going to hire a lawyer to id you, asked a friend before the trial. , sah,” replied the darky, all I can do to pay my fine, L short “itll be let alone ADVICE TO GOLF WIDOWS If you can’t argue golf out of your husband at home, follow him over the course and keep at it. Your constant nagging will destroy his mental poise, spoil his game, and he will soon have to give up. toe of Woop was a was a barber. madly in love waitress. Joe Saturday nights. clerk. Jim Riley Joe and Jim were with Flora Wilkins, a always visited his, love Jim’s night was Wed- married Jim. On the following Saturday night Joe presented himself at her door as usual. “You can’t come in, Jc regretfully. “You know now.” “Huh,” said Joe, giving her a haughty glance. “I didn’t come to sce you. I came to get shaved.” nid Flora, married I'm Ballades of a Dub by A. N.C. Fowler No Moth Balls for My Clubs This Year Sex T shall need hot water bags And furs around my B. V. D.'s, With many other warmer rags Enclosing arms and chest and knees, Lest when I golf such members freeze In this young winter, drab and sere; For I must play, e’en though I sneeze— No moth balls for my clubs this year. Yet ere December onward dr: Its crop of grippes and pleur Why not amass some baggag And check my clubs down wh Are seeking honeyed argosi In some far tropic vista nes The salty tang of Southern seas? No moth balls for my clubs this year. ags > the bees As old King Frost quite nearer shags T heap together on my knees E circular that neatly brags Of courses by the Southern Keys With such allurements as shall please Beneath a warmer atmosphere— I yield to their cajoleries— No moth balls for my clubs this year. LEnvoi Ye wood and irons, autumn flees; I think we'll go away from here And dub around the Belair tees— No moth balls for my clubs this year. Rated A ceRTAIN group of older men in a small town in Virginia meet quite often and usually have something to drink. The oldest one was observed to always hold his nose while drinking. One night he was asked why he did it and if he dis- liked the smell. His reply was: “If I smell the stuff it makes my mouth water and I don't want my drinks diluted with anything.” M4 Gxoor Gercn, a metropolis of the great open spaces, had at one time supported a small church but the popu lation had slowly dwindled until it wa impossible longer to collect enough money to pay the parson’s salary. ‘The parson therefore, doffed the cloth and established alunch-room near the station. One Sun day night a traveling man who regular! passed through Snoot Gulch dropped. in at the linch-room and ordered supper After having waited for more than a hal hour without being offered more than a glass of water, he called to the former parsor “YX replied that gentleman. “T was just: wondering, parson, the traveling man, “if you had cut out the Sunday evening service. said Rata TY TrisimeN roomed in an eight story apartment on the top floor and could not sleep on Sunday morning, as th: sun would shine in the windows and wak« them up. They bought some black paint andl painted the windows and fay down to When they woke up they realized y would be for work, as it was seven fifteen. They rushed to their jobs and the foreman looked at them in. be wilderment. Pat says, “Faith and what's the matter, boss? We're only twenty minutes lat The Foreman—Twenty Where were you Monds minutes, hell! and Tuesday? aoe HE ATTENTIVE clothing salesman had bent his full energies to the business of selling Mrs. Plunk a suit each for the twins. The cute little boys had been no more trouble than a box of monkeys with th: lid off, and the distracted salesman was only too glad when at last one of the twins appeared to be fitted the suited. and mother Madam, you will want a suit questioned the cloth for the other bos ing Hesman. ome will « lo.” mother. replied the econom “Its for wearing on Sun and Thav iged to have Tommy attend the M. Sunday school in’ the mornin: d Billy the P. EB. Sunday school in the afternoon.” The Monk—What the dooce has be- come of all those golf balls? comicbooks.com