Judge — September 15, 1923 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PANAMA GOLF CLUB This course holds the record for divots. You know the Panama Canal. Th’ Wadje Bird by CW. Myers for alittle while,” says the Ford, Edison restone party, when going on their tion, Away from rattling automobiles, A Wanse bird perched high sereeching phonographs and flat tires. LL Cop in a dogwood tree rer An’ sang, as I passed by, Tone, A weirdlike melody, Vamped by Raymond Barrett Aboot tae putt a bit, I NEVER met the lady, nor I stopped tae hear him sing; Her name I never heard; Frae branch tae branch he lit, My memory of how she loo! I wished him oon th’ wing. Is very vague and blurred. She followed me about the course TW’ wadje kenned his richt, Perhaps three hours or more; He wadna fly awa’: And ev'ry time I went to putt, I tapped my ba’ too licht, She sweetly yodeled: “Fore!” Tcadna putt at a’. With full intent T sliced a shot Ballades of a Dub My Timing’s Far from Standard Time by A. N. C. Fowler | fe HATE to have to catch a train Upon the timing of my swing Because I don’t seem to attain The proper rhythm of the thing Since in ad my hands I bring Or else my body without rhyme Or reason tends to quickening— My timing’s far from standard time. My upswing’s slow cnough, it’s plain, And rigid is my tense left wing. As to my bean, I'd quite disdain To move my dome for anything: Yet when my arms I downward fling I generally find that Pm As potent as a bum watch spring— My timing’s far from standard time. No correlation do T gain of all my practicing, n I'm so greatly fain To kill my harmless Silver King I'm all tied up and press and, bi L scoop the ball into the slime And knock my fond hopes glimmeri My timing’s far from standard time. DEnvoi Chick Evans, unto you T sing While yet Fm in my golfing pr What is your trick of mastering? My timing’s far from standard time. ott Resignation by Carlyle F. Straub An’ then I tried tae drive, Into the knee high grass; Progen one may ne vet hope to gain I foun’ it was na use: And then, as is golf etiquette, ee we 5 : id The merest duffer may attain Th’ bird seemed tae connive I signaled her to pass. Hoe dices Wi’ spirits wild an’ loose. But as I searched the tangle where -\ WOrkINg IneHicren My shot had seemed to fall, wae Th’ reason why th’ warld She drove without a warning word In the early days of golf they used few o” us hae stirred— And beaned me with her ball. halls stuffed ‘with’ feathers. Doubtless | e let oor they picked them waek, ‘be GOLF AS A CURE FOR NERVOUSNESS fromthe birdies, | snarled iennaannnnanae Oop by th’ wadje bird. sas SMALL boy was | A reading about the new President. He looked up at his father who was sitting next to him and said: “Pa, will there ever be a woman president? 0, my son. The Constitution says the President must be over io hello brother * a Tee anestel Hum!” said Mr Higgs, rising from se ““Ho! Ho! chair and ing himself. Now that Thad a good sleep in. the library, I think ‘Il go up and 1 for awhile in the eas stre American important thing is how Presi- dent Coolidge forty-five years of <= a > age, and women Treatment this week, $650. Total expense to date, $4,206. ends on th don’t get that An addition to the club- The club pro. wins the He is asked to subscribe Ordinary Ameri- old.” house is proposed, and National Open Cham- $50 for prizes for the bee Raine pai he is asked to subscribe pionship, and he is asked annual club champion- can ee, bow Pathe to $500 worth of stock. to subscribe $100 for a ship. He does. Total, doesn’t matter at To get away He does. car to be given to the $650. all just so he from civilization champion. He does. stands on it. 1g comicbooks.com ‘Seamaliheescciiiibaiminiaeiig Tagze ee i ce