Judge — February 10, 1923 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Told at the 19th Hole Asheville Country Club, Asheville, N.C. SO TU TTUTTITTATIL LLL ALLL Lo LALLA LL les and Birdies by Walter Trumbull H FE 1sa veteran of golf, And this a truthful line; Lit, on and off, For he has pl Since back in "99. But time has never changed his gait, At least so we opine; Since he’s still out in 98. And back in 99. + * « If practice made perfect we'd be the best niblick shot in the world. ever play cards against lovers. They are too good at holding hands. I ITTLE RAPSCALLION, now where have you 4 gone Leaving me here lonely vigil to keep? Quite without warning, asi nha yawn, You slipped away through the valley of sleep. What are the dreams you have journeyed to we? Beautiful playthings, which glitter and shine? Gather a heartful and come back to me, Little rapscallion of mine. swallowed a fermented laden line. The the next twelve The Owl, grape, pulled a Parrot, overhearing it, durir months gained great reputation as a wit Then the Parrot, puffed with praise, tried a and in the next t ve having laughter line of its own seconds gained great reputation as a half-w ‘The most sophisticated man about town is usually man about seventeen. s the sume for every heart. The rence is the singer. One only dif “Some water hazard.” D"* to me only with thine eyes And will pledge with mine, For there's but half of one per cent. Of kick within the wine. Td buy thee, sweet, stuff less uncouth If only [ were able, But that’s a prohibition sleuth Who's squinting at our table. Yo wasn’t on the level with me, kid Don’t never figure that I didn’t know. I knew I wouldn't hear no talk of what you And sort of turned my eyes aw Things in my heart. T wasn’t x: The gang a little bunch 0° calico Could ever make me spincless as a squid At last I quit you. Now you think a heap Of me, or anyhow that's what you say. Well, [found love was nothin’ much but pain Tm through. cheap And lovin’ me you wouldn't act that way. Oh, kid, T wish Thad you back again! but just because I loved you so You say you care, but talk is Eyes are often mir which reflect’ rather than windows which disclose a soul. 6 From the appearance of the scenery, there isn’t much bunk about the bunkers. /NVUAUGEATNUN GAO ate caveA UA Many rhymes are merely slippers to cover metrical feet A golf course is one which is served between nine and ninety. * Ballades of a Dub by A. N.C. Fowler Where Is the Hair of Yesteryear? T HESE youngsters skip from tee to tee And none them a hat will wear, And if the sun shine torridly They never mind the heat and glare; But I, at fifty, flash a bare, Immodest egg that can’t appear In public without lid or hair Where is the hair of yesteryear? Way back in cighteen ninety-three My coiffure simply was a bear Whose plentiful villosity Would make the hirsute halt and stare In envy —but at present where Is all my noddle’s wavy gear? My dome’s capillament so Where is the hair of yestery Task you to what glabrous The wind did my hirsuties bear So my chignon’s a nullity, My locks but ilections rare? My tousled tresses [can’t spare When on the fairway I appear So piteously I declare, Where is the hair of yesteryear? L’Envoi Youth flies, and foreloc too when one grows. s¢ ks have a flair For dying . And sunburned beans are such a care Where is the hair of yesteryear? comichooks.