Judge — January 27, 1923 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Drawn by GILBERT WILKINSON. “I thought you had gone away for a few days?” “My dearest, we had every intention of doing so, then mamma let him have his way. The New Freedom by Feliz Miles Fe many years consistently I’ve treated breakfast distantly, And tried to get along without my lunch, At tables spread invitingly I’ve tasted dinners slightingly, With hope of making good my doctor's hunch. T’ve tried with spirit vigorous to live on diet rigorous, And follow all his rules for losing weight; And though I've starved religiously, my girth expands prodigiously, And gains in gauge at most alarming rate. T'm craving foods that satisfy my appetite and that is why I gladly hail the famous British sage, Who comes along assuring us that diets, far from curing us, completely humiliated.” Comprise the master menace of the age. This learned man advises us, which pleases and surprises us, That doctors dope the thing entirely wrong. He says that what we ought to eat is any kind or sort 0” meat Or other stuff for which our palates long. Oh, doctor, great and erudite, I truly hope I hear you right, And that you really said the things they claim, and We're gummir atomic game. I'm tired of dining meagerly, and so I'll hasten eagerly, Toeat the finest cuts my chef can carve, For I’ve found it most disquieting to be forever dieting, And eating stuff that let’s a fellow starve. 2 So here we are iu your coal man delivers to you rock, instead of coal, take a few of the largest lumps and throw them through his windows. If he has you arrested for throwing coal through his window, no- body will believe him, and if he has you arrested for throwing rocks he'll con- vict himself of selling rocks instead of coal. rer She—What makes you like Bessie so well? He—Bobbed hair, flapper manners, vac: ins and too much make-up. surprised! That certainly desc st of the girls, but certainly not Bessie know it—that’s why I like her so sae iss—Does your wife ever get up in the air? Kross—You lands on me. bet! And she always comichooks.