Judge — August 12, 1922 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PHYSICIAN was walking up Broad 2X way when he saw a dentist friend looking at some shirts in a show window, Just then a panhandler stepped up to the dentist and began to unravel a hard ick story. ‘To the physician's astonish- rent the dentist lifted his hand to his ear and said, raising his voice consider- ably: “How's that? You'll to speak ouder. Pm hard of hearing.” The pan- andler hurried away. grumbling to him- vlf. The physician walked up and laid is hand on_ the shoulder. Fim,” he said, “you seem to have car trouble.” No. perfectly normal.” was the reply. “But that chap was a professional, and ‘playing deaf’ is the best way I know to. vet rid of that kind.”—DPittsburgh Dis- atch, have dentist's “ “You dont seem to think much of my car” said the owner of a dilapidated flivver, wouldn't say that.” replied the tact man. “What do you call this ption here on the front of your ator?” That's a figure of Mercury. it for an ornament.” “Well, now, that’s piece of work as anything T ever saw.” fye-Herald. ttt T bought about as neat a Birmingham “What do vou think of the young girls wearing knickers nowadays “Splendid training. When — they marry most of “em will wear the trousers, in the family, any way."—New York Sun. Prey “Did gagements while in intereste Id lady. “Only five,” replied the ex-A.E. Fer with becoming modesty. “And you came through them all un- hurt?” participate in France?” many en asked the you he returned sadly, “I married the fifth.”"—Lmerican Legion Weekly. Eric—Come on, Peg—out here! Peg—With my new costume on! (London). “Awfully sorry to hear that your wife has run away with your chauf- feur.” “Oh, that’s all right. I was going to discharge him, in any case."—Son- dags Nisse (Stockholm). se Hibrow—Did the Karl you had ast night bring his coronet? I didn’t even know he Passing Show (London). Mrs. to dinn Mrs. could play one, wrich He—Will you love me if I give up all my bad habits? She—But, George, how could you expect me to love a perfect stranger?—London Opinion. It’s likely, isn’t it?—Passing Show RVILLE WRIGHT, at a dinner in Dayton, was reproached for not tak- ing up the challenge of the Smithsonian Institute that it was Langley, not the Wrights, who was the first to fl, “The trouble with vou, Orville,” said a banker, “is that you are too taciturn. You don’t assert. yourself igh. You should pressagentize mor My dear friend,” Orville Wright answered, “the best talker and the worst flver among the birds is the parrot.” —Detroit Free Press. ‘ te US 2 SI, from across the road, / watched Professor Jenks enter the grocery. Nobody he’s entitled said some one. Unele s dd. knows how many letters to write after his name,” “But what I can't ike out is how he’ come’ by all/his none of his Fars I know sever amounted to much ina you talkin’ abou manded Carker, warmly m know’s well’s T do that his father could spell Nebuchadnezzar quicker'n any other Philadelphia Ledger. ttt N ONE of the palatial homes of the new rich a man sat before a blazing fires a cigar between his teeth, a liqueur at his clhow. His friend sat opposite, likewise fortified. The host was bewailing the enormous cost of keeping his son at col “Such expenses!” he cried. languages.” repeated “And the worst of all is th “Language “How's that?” “Well,” said his host, “there item in the bill which runs, ‘For Scotch, Answers (London). ery his friend. is one Referee in bankruptey—When you ar- ranged for ihat credit you said you and your partner had $100,000 between you? Was that statement true? Bankrupt—Sure, it was true. I lived on one side of the Local Trust and Sav- ings Bank and he lived on the other. Boston Globe.