Judge — April 22, 1922 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“Lawyers,” said Uncle Eben, “mos’ly acks so unpleasant cross-examinin’ folks dat I can’t see how so many of ’em gits popu- lar enough to be elected to offices."—Washing- ton Star. Boy—I want a dime to give to a lame man. Mother—You shall have it. And who is the lame man, dear? “Oh, he’s the door- keeper at the movies.” —Milestones. “I thought you told me it was to be a minor operation?” “So it was, my dear sir.” “But I could have had a major operation for the sum you've charged me.”—Detroit Free Press. “I got to practice on the piano five hours a day.” “What for?” “'Cause pa and ma don't like our new neighbors.”—Boston Transcript. “Hey, Stup. aia? Heatit orf there there! Dyer wanta area. Noah—I'm sorry, but there is only room in the steerage. Mr. and Mrs. Hippo (together)—Horrors! traveled first cabin! The Katy station at Chetopa was held up one night recently, and two employees were told to “stick 'em up.” The Clipper says that “those dents in the ceiling of the ticket office are where Robison and Wallace tried to poke their fingers through in the effort to get 'em higher.”—Kansas City Star. 4, re ee up the whole party?” Gee e! Monk! You toddle OA} T4246 the an Sk track-horse!” ES SIM; CI Over frese re Se And we have always Edith — When it comes to marrying, I wouldn’t give a thought to how much a man was making. Maud — Neither would I, dear. What would primarily inter- est me would be how much he had already made. There’s no use taking chances.—Bos- ton Transcript. Wife (reading let- ter) — Mamma say she’s delighted to hear that you've left off smoking. Hubby—Oh, indeed! Well! Wife—She always detested the smell of tobacco, but now she will come and make us a good long visit—Answers (London) Wife (during spat)—My dear Henry don’t harbor the idea that I am ignor ant. I know a good deal more than I care to tell. Hub—I wish, my dear, that you'd fill up on that sort of knowledge.— Boston Transcript. MY AN