Judge — March 11, 1922 — page 27: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

4 it is d soa a ene Hey, Mister Hipp! Give us a see saw? Wit and Wisdom of Children TRUE TO HER TRUST Gertrude, aged twelve, was to be housekeeper while her mother spent the day at their fruit ranch a few miles down the valley. Before leaving in the morning, Mrs. Willis gave her happy-go-lucky daugh- ter explicit instructions that when the plumber came she was to tell him it was the laundry faucets which needed fixing, “and anything else he wants to know,” she added hurriedly. The plumber came and after telling him where the repairs were needed and showing him to the basement, Gertrude went blithely about her work. For a time the noise of pipe pounding wrangled with the clatter of dishes, when upon discovering that he had failed to bring a full kit of tools, the man called up the cellar-way: “Hey, there, kid! Got a monkey wrench anywheres ‘round?” After an instant of silence in the direction of the kitchen, the girl stam- mered down: “Why—n-o, ours is a fruit ranch!” NAUGHTY WORDS WANTED Little Fannie, aged six, fell and painfully bruised both her knees. She glanced around and decided no one had seen her. Rising slowly, she vehe- mently exclaimed: “Thank the Lord! Thank the Lord! Thank the Lord!” She went into the house presently and asked her mother if ‘thank the Lord’ were naughty words. FULLER HUMOR thing! “Aw, Willie, I thought ye said ye could hit some- ” “Surely! Anything to please the boys.” HER CURIOSITY The audience held its breath with amazement as the acrobat swung high above the rostrum, held only by a frail cord looped around one foot. Somewhere among the spectators a little girl arose from her seat. “Mam- ma,” she shouted, breaking the silence, “can you do that?” The lady tried to quiet her, but the child persisted in demanding whether or not her mother had ever climbed ropes or done anything of this sort. At last, ‘embarrassed by the attention which the child was attracting, the mother jerked the child into the seat, warning, “You just wait until I get home!” “Oh!” exclaimed the little disturber, “then you're gonna try it?” For the first time Mrs. Peck drives a nail with- out hitting her thumb. Mr. Crank addresses his car. ———————