Judge — March 11, 1922 — page 25: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The rector was on his way to church when he met the gamekeeper. “Ah,” said the rector, “how is it, my friend, that I never see you at church?” “Well,” said the gamekeeper, “you see, sir, I don’t want to make your congregation smaller.” “What do you mean?” the rector said sharply. “Well, you see, sir,” the keeper said, “if I came to church some of the others would go poaching.”—London Post. A cowman from Medicine Bow stepped into a cigar store in Chicago and asked for a match. “Matches,” replied the clerk, ‘are for sale, not to give away.” “How much are they?” “One cent a box.” The cowman bought a box, and handed it back after taking out a match. “Here,” he said, “put that back on your shelf, and when a gentle- man asks you for a light give him one.” —Union Pacific Family Bulletin. “Does your son show any particular athletic tendency at college?” “Oh, yes; he’s running through my money.”—Detroit Free Press. “Play your cards a bit quicker. Comrade wrecked and nearing land) — Well, we've done our eight hours, Joe. Wot about knockin’ off? The Other—Righto! —Passing Show (London). Class - conscious (ship- (Both drown). “In heaven the streets will be paved with gold.” “I don’t care anything about the paving material,” replied Mr. Chug- gins, “if only they won’t consider it necessary to put up a lot of ‘One-way’ signs.”—Washington Star. “John, your face looks terribly bat- tered up,” said the teacher to John, aged seven. “You haven’t been fight- ing on the way to school, have you?” she inquired. “No,” said John, “we moved yester- day and I had to carry the cat.”—In- dianapolis News. | “18 WAN Z a \ Ay RS Me, 23 “How's Jig Fiddlin’s rheumatism by now?” asked an acquaintance. “Well,” replied Sam Flatt of Strad- dle Ridge, Ark., “’pears like it’s bet- ter. His mother-in-law made up some liniment out of bone-dry licker and one thing and another, and I reckon she didn’t weaken it down enough. Tennyrate, Jig rubbed it on his legs, and sixteen seconds later jumped through the winder and lit out, hitting the high places for the tall timber, yelling in an unknown tongue at every jump. Took him three days to get back, and he says that either the exer- cise or the liniment cured him, and he don’t know—p-tu!—which.”—Kan- sas City Star. “Pretty good rubber you have now.” said the fat patron of a Turkish bath. “Yes,” said the proprietor. “T thought the fellow would make good when I hired him.” “He works like an experienced man.” “He’s had plenty of experience, all right. He used to swab decks on a liner."—Birmingham Age-Herald. “I Have often watched the pancake man in the restaurant window.” “He gets a quick turnover.”—Louis- ville Courier-Journal. What you need is a fortune-teller to advise you what cards to play.” —Meggendorfer Blaetter (Munich). comicbooks.com 1