Judge — October 29, 1921 — page 29: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A DANGEROUS OPERATION—‘“Some women operate on the basis that it is better to be naughty than neg- lected.”—Los Angeles Times. SHOULDERING HER BURDEN—The Husband (filling in census form)— Let me see, dear, what is your exact age? The Wife—Put thirty-five, George. “Then I’d better put myself down is seventy, so that the total will come out right.”—Passing Show (Lon The Stage Way. Sra | _He (with deep feeling)—What a night of wonder, Cynthia. It seems to understand—to rejoice—in our hap- Piness.—London Mail. UNIMPORTANT—“You were at the cpera last evening?” “Yes; perfectly delightful time!” “What did you hear?” “Hear? Oh, Madge Gray is en- gaged at last, and the Billy Brews are going to get a divorce, and Bert Bailey has lost all his money in Wall Street, and Sue Cathro has a baby, and Mrs. Sylee was lunching with another man while her husband was out of town, and—” “But—you don’t understand. What did you see?” “See? Why, that Kate Kady has turned her old rose gown, and that those wonderful Van Gruber dia- monds we read of are only paste, and that the Adleys are hardly on speaking terms, even in_ public and—” “But—but—what was the name of the opera?” “Name of the opera? Oh—why, I did see it on the program, but really I’ve forgotten—I’ve such a_ poor memory for details; really it is quite a cross!”—Los Angeles Times. SyMPATHY—“Two weeks ago I re- fused to marry Freddie, and he has been drinking heavily ever since,” said Jess. “Yes,” responded her dear friend Tess, “that’s a foolish habit of Fred- die’s—he never knows when to stop a celebration.”—Town Topics. THE KNEESIEST WAY—His Wife— I do wish I had a new evening frock. Everyone will recognize this old one. Mr. Nicklepinch—Oh, just cut a little off each end and they’ll think it’s brand new.—Detroit News. ASK Dab, HE KNows—Willie Wil- lis—Pa, what do they mean when they say a woman is dressed in the “height of fashion”? Papa Wili About an inch above the knees, my son.—Town Topics. ON A JuRY—“Yes, we acquitted the woman.” “You stretched a point.” “T know we did. She wasn’t very good looking.”—Louisville Courier- Journal. Too FLIGHTY—“I tell you what,” said Mrs. Umson, “it won’t be long before women are in many of the public offices.” “Well,” said Umson, in reply, “I don’t care so much what they do as long as they keep out of the weather department.” “Why should they keep out of the weather department?” “The weather is changeable enough now.”—Youngstown Tele- gram. SAVING His WIND—Dugald M’Tay- ish, the all-round athlete and sports- man in the village, entered his name for all events in the local Highland games. The first event on the program was the half-mile, and of eight runners Dugald finished eighth. “Dugald, Dugald,” said a fellow Scot, “why do you not run faster?” “Run faster!” he said scornfully, “an’ me reservin’ mysel’ for the bagpipe competition.” — Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph. The Ordinary Way. He (with no feeling whatever)— It’s stopped raining. Shall I let the dog out?—London Mail. comicbooks.com