Judge — October 29, 1921 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WITH THE COLLEGE WITS Irrepressible, Did You Ever? PEAKING of clothes— “7 Did your girl Ever wear one dress Until, when anyone Said, “Can a leopard change His spots?” You always thought Of her And voted “No?” And then One day When you’d been looking for her And finally You spotted that dress And dashed up And called her “Sweetie” Or something soft Like that And when the dress turned around Her roommate said, “You fresh thing!” Didn’t you recall Something about a wolf In “sheep’s clothing?” — —Utah Hum-Bug. tevez Cyril—How did Jones become a lord? Claude—When he declined an in- vitation to Buckingham Palace, the king made him appear.—Williams Purple Cow. Joyous, PeePeeeeto He (passionately)—Don’t you feel the call of the irresistible? F She—Sure, let’s eat.—Pennsylvania Punch Bowl. A Rare One I once knew A Girl Who was so modest That she wouldn’t Even do Improper Fractions. —Carolina Tar Baby. People We All Have Met PHYLLIS PHULLABULL, the dame who, after you've taken her to a dance, and are walking her home, with about two-bits in your jeans, keeps talking about the swell time she had the night before out riding with the bird who pilots the Rolled- Rice. O. Goliath Downe, the dumb-bell who, whenever you start to relate the latest wheeze, takes the words out of your mouth and grabs the plaudits of * the gang for himself. Miss Helfer-Eaton, the frail young thing, whose order at A’s and K’s sounds to you like the reading of a casualty list wherein the names of most of your family appear. Iver E. Dome, the unconscious sap, who got only a “D” in a certain course. “You see it should have been an ‘A,’ but the Prof. marks low, and had it in for him, anyway,—” etc. Buster Hart, the shell-shock, whose hobby is pin-planting, and then dig- ging up said pin when he sees a fairer looking “garden” on the hori- zon.—Oregon Ag. Orange Owl. 30 Irresponsible Happiness—A Recipe O make it, take a hall, dim lit; A pair of stairs where two may sit; Of music soft, a bar or so; Two spoons of—just two spoons, you know; Of little love pats, one or two, Or one squeezed hand instead will do; A waist—the size to be embraced; And two ripe lips, rose red—to taste; And if the lips are soft and sweet, You'll find your happiness complete. —Lehigh Burr. Off Color SHE got the lipstick by mistake \” When penciling her eyebrows; I thought at first ’twas some new fad, She learned among the highbrows. She took one squint into her glass, And knew she pulled a skuller; “T’ll have to go straight home,” she sobbed, “T’m terribly off color.” —Notre Dame Juggler. He—Darling, do you love me? She—Yes. He—Are you willing to live on my income? She—Yes, if you get another for yourself :—Oregon Ag. Orange Owl. comicbooks.com