Judge — September 10, 1921 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Digest THE ARTFUL ANGLER—“That man is what I call a first-class fisherman,” remarked Farmer Corntassel. “But he never brings in a fish.” “No. But he can set down and en- tertain the company for hours ex- plaining how he happened not to catch anything.”—Washington Star. Lost Bait—Fishing hasn’t the kick in it that it used to have.— Washington Post. THE REASON FOR THE TRIP—“Let’s go fishing?” “Why go to all that trouble? Let’s stay right here and empty the bottle now.”—Detroit Free Pres HEARTLESS—“I think she’s heart- less.” “What makes you say that?” “She goes fishing with her husband and baits her own hook.”—Detroit Free Press. How THEY WERE MADE—Old Injun Pete up at the reservation tells me that one day the Great Spirit made all the other fishes exceptin’ the blue gill and sunfish. A fairy or sumpin comes along and sez, “O great Spirit, you have made many fine fishes for men but what are you gonna make for the boys?” And the Great Spirit smiles and sez, “I have saved that for the last.” So he takes some Minne- sota sunset, a chunk offn the rain- bow, some of the lakes deepest blue anda tiny piece of lightnin’, for speed and he mixes ’em up jest right and makes a blue gill and a sunfish. Of course I don’t know how true it is but it sure sounds likely enough.— Outers’ Recreation. PrRIzE YARN—“While fishing in Salt River, recently, Joe Johnson caught a small fish on his hook. of the World’s Thinking it would make good bait he left it on the hook and along came a sun perch and swallowed the fish. Thinking the perch would better his chances for big fish he continued fish- ing with the new bait and had only waited a few minutes until a river cat came along and drove the two fishes up on the line and was caught on the hook.”—Kansas City Star. Circumstantial Evidence MS FAMILIAR. WHERE HAVE WE RE 2” Fliegende Blaetter (Munich). Poor FisH—We often wonder how a fish must feel when, quite against its wish, ’tis hooked away down in its throat and gaffed to boot when it nears the boat. Indeed, this is no idle chaff. We wonder how it stands the gaff. We say “Poor fish!” with scornful laugh—but anglers, too, must stand the gaff. It takes a man of nerve, we'll say, to bake out in a boat all day. When it’s one hundred in the shade and old Dame Nature shrinks, dismayed—when even the cricket on his beat is suffering with the prickly heat—it takes a lot of nerve, quoth we, out in an open boat to be, like mariners adrift at sea— William F. Kirk in Outers’ Rec- reation. 21 Humor TEXAS CALM—The inquisitive sub- scriber of Wharton inquires if we are awake to the Japanese peril. We are. We are moving heaven and earth to save Texas, but are about to despair. They have slipped up on us and crowded into the State until there are now enough of them to average one to every 500 square miles, and they have grabbed all of our land ex- cept 175,000,000 acres. — Houston Post. CoAL SHOVEL OR HARP—Crimson- beak—What do you think will be the music of the future? Yeast—It depends altogether on where you’re going to spend it.— Yonkers Statesman. UNHAPPY FINALE—“Did the play have a happy ending?” “Naw, my wife left her new opera glasses in the theater.”—Louwisville Courier-Journal. FAMILY PRIDE—‘“Mrs. De Graw makes me feel so small when she be- gins to talk about her ancestors. And we have no ancestors.” “Never mind, dear. Come back at her with the pedigree of your dog.”— Boston Transcript. THE POWER OF CuSTOM—“You gave up trying to regulate bathing costumes?” “Had to,” replied the seaside con- stable. “It isn’t reasonable to expect a man to arrest his own wife and daughters.”—Washington Star. HoME-Town Gossip—A doctor has operated on a lad’s head to make him a better boy. A good many of us have a distinct recollection that our fathers operated in a different place to make us better boys. — Hardy (Ga.) Herald. comicbooks.com