Judge — June 11, 1921 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

No Visible Means of Support Agile Porkers —“You call this a pro gressive town?" 1 the native. let pigs run in the streets.” They “Sure,” si “Why, vo! “Well, them’s progressive pigs kin dodge any autymobeel that wuz ever Birmingham Age- Herald. made.” When to Shoot in France —They set out to shoot rabbits—two Frenchmen and an Englishman. — All were eager, anxious, active. Suddenly they beheld it The Englishman elevated his gun. “No, no, do not shoot!” cried his com- “That is Mimi. We never shoot a rab panions. at Mim The Englishman, wondering, disgusted, desisted. «Another rabbit. Again the gun of the Englishman was elevated, but he was not permitted to fire. “That is the adorable Lulu,” they cried “C'est un vrai bijou! We never shoot at Lu 1 When a third rabbit appeared the Eng- lishman was tired, but his companion cried out; “Shoot, always (Paris). That is Alfonse! We Alfonse.”"—Le Sport shoot! shoot at Speaking Eyes—Yeust—He has speak- ing eyes, they say Crimsonbeak—I suppose they mean the kind that talk in a Prohibition town. Yonkers Statesman. Dangerous—That’s a dangerous prac- tice those Kentucky planters are fooling with—burning the real tobacco crop. A short cabbage and lettuce crop now would put the smokers in a precarious situation. Kansas City Star. The Shortest Way Round “Bec PARDON, GUVERN: “VELL, LET ME SEE r —The Tatle Curiosity—In a street car the other day aman and his wife saw a cockroach on the floor. “T never see one of those things,” said the man, “without wondering where it came from.” . “And I never see one,” said the wife, “without wondering where it is going.” —Voungstown Telegram. A Pertinent Hint—When a man begins to shout his good deeds from the housetop, it is your clue to look into the cellar for his evil ones.—Chicago News About all that Hard ing has to do is to satisfy the farmers, the labor unions, the business men, and a few other Aingeles Times classes.—Los It Talks—"I shall wear my new evening dress tonight—isn’t it a poe “Judging from its shortness, I should say it’s an epigram.” Philadelphia Bulletin. , COULD YER GIVE ME NINEPENCE FOR A BED? MATRIMONY An Adanta husband, having offended, came home the evening of the quarrel with a parcel under his arm “ Darling,” The One He Loved Best he said to his wife, “look here. I’ve got something here for the per- son I love best in all the world.” She came forward with a shrug. “Humph! What is it?” she asked. “A box of cigars?” —Thermoid News. Beginning to Learn—Rupert—Don't talk to me of discipline. Jack—Why not, old cha, Rupert—1 served in the war and then got married; but now I’m hone. I’m only just beginning to learn the real meaning of Toronto Telegram. discipline. Post Mortems—“ Wasn't there some thing about a promise to love, honor and Barber—(e LovioN THAT KEEPS © MAIR FROM FALLING OUT COSTS THREE FRANCS; THE LOTION THAT MAKES IT GROW IN COSTS SIX FRANCS. Customer—I THInk [Lt ECONOMIZE BY BUYING wic.—Le Journal Amusant (Paris). A And Friendless Still—This is indeed a land of opportunity. Some of our most influential Profiteers were once penniless and friendless—San Antonio Light, obey in that marriage ceremony?” asked her husband quietly. “My goodness Henry!” Voter. “You are like these tiresome pol iticians who never stop talking about the party platform.”—Boston Transcript. responded Mrs comicbooks.com