Judge — May 15, 1920 — page 17: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

« Rire (Paris) Digest of Novelty “I have a novel idea for a film pla: “What is it?” “The husband and wife in the have no serious marital difliculties.” Detroit Free Press. plot Educational—* You this is an educational film?” “y replicd the movie blandly, “But it features a ‘vampire.’ “Exactly, We're trying to make the world safe for marricd = men.” —Los Ingeles Times. sty magnate Underpaid —“It doesn't seem quite fair.” “What doesn’t?” ‘This motion picture comedian gets S1000 a week and his dog, who docs all the work and creates most of the laughs gets only two or three bones a day.” Birmingham Age- Herald Handicap—" Isn't it odd successful in the Natural that women are so motion pictures?” “Why is it odd?” “Because it is the Baltimore: American. silent dram.” “* Rattlesnake What's the His Prestige Gone- Bill’ is strangely altered. trouble?” “Bill says if he had known what was before him when he went into the movies he would have stuck to train robbing and kept his self-respect. In the old «lays no man ever talked to him the way the director docs and lived to tell the tale."—Birmingham Age- Herald. the World The Soul of Thrift ous Caurait fait p tx francs! “Look here, waiter! This isn’t a ste leather Waiter—Well, maker would Yer gettin’ a b. Méle (Paris). That's So—* There's a lot of love on the sercen.”” “Yes; but there is a dumed sight more in front of it.’—Film Fun. The Beginning Hoyle—I am writ ing a moving-picture scenario, Doyle—How far have you gressed? Hoyle—Well, 1 have begun with the kiss at the end.—London Blighty. pro: Battle of the Stars Battle, battle, movie stars, Tell the world your family jars, We yearn to know which one got rough, (But fear it’s all press agent stuff) —Barber County (Kan) Index 7 Substitute Anointment—lI sce that a ship was christened with crude oil the other day.” “ Christened? don't you?"—B. You mean shampooed, fulo Express In No Hurry—lt was a big cotton manufacturing town in Lancashire, where a revival service had been held, At the close the minister called upon all those who wished to go to Heaven to stand up. All rose to their feet with the exception of one young man “Don't you want to go to Heaven my triend?” asked the preacher. “Oh, aye, I want to go, reet enough,” ¥ fellow replied, “but not wi? London Tit-Bits the you this trip.” The Passel Post—" Any mail fer me today?” asked Si Meddergrass, as he me into the Hicksville Pustofiic “Betcha!” replied the Pustmaster. “There's a cream separator, & buggy to a tractor radiator and a wagon tongu Cincinnati Enquir Doomed to Disappointment * Speaking of hopeful dispositions, there's Mrs. Blobbs.”’ “What about Mrs. Blobbs?”” “She's bought a ouija board with the expectation of finding out where and h Blobbs spends his evenings.” —Birming- hom Age- Herald Retaliation — The — Kestaurateur How's this? You've charged me sixty- five cents for a shave. The Barber—O, no, I charged only fif- teen cents for the shave. is my overcharge.—Bosvos