Judge, 1920-05-08 · page 33 of 36
Judge — May 8, 1920 — page 33: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is primarily a **literary and advertising page** rather than political satire. The main content includes: **Literary pieces:** - "Affordisms" by Richard Butler Grayson: humorous verse about whether people can afford luxuries, culminating in a pun ("A Ford or not a Ford?")—a reference to Henry Ford's affordable Model T automobile - "The Flirt" by H.M. Sutherland: a satirical character sketch of the archetypal flirt as simultaneously childish and manipulative, destined to age into spinsterhood or desperate matrimony **Central cartoon**: A crude anatomical drawing labeled "A Profit-Ear," appearing to mock or illustrate some economic or bodily concept (unclear without additional context). **Advertising**: Dominates the right side—promoting correspondence courses (piano, health/strength training by "Lionel Strongfort"), marriage advice books, and lachnite products. **Social humor**: The dialogue snippets mock marriage dynamics and romantic delusions typical of 1920s domestic comedy. The page reflects **post-WWI consumer culture** and conventional gender stereotypes rather than explicit political commentary.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
am! cell, ua Id old ve m 0 is May 8, 1920 Every Married Couple and all who contemplate this complete informative book New Life” By JOHN COWAN, M. D. Publishing Co., a fone (or ospane free book “Wt Quine Conservatory, Si JE. 588 ‘Colombia head, Baston, 25, most. Affordisms By Ricusko Butter Grarnzer FFORD or not afford, that is the hitch . to answer which In many a question no’ Depends a lot upon the neighborhood Where whether your eredit’s good Or skidding slowly downhill to a ditch, oung Mr. Wiseguy will proclaim “A fitch on,” “Lost the boobs who In time saves bi snitch.”” It's hatd to say just what a fellow should Afford or not afford. Of course, if it’s for show or speed you itch, No matter what you buy you soon will switch To Something Better since less understood Like swopping Wilson for a Leonard Wood But who will ponder, unless newly rich; “A Ford or not a Ford?” Regarding Editorial, Subscription and Advertising Matters SUBSCRIPTION OFFICES: Main. Railding, 2 thy Av NEW Vok Should Own “The Science of a NOw voRn CITY LEARN PIANO! This Interesting Free Book can become a skilled payer at Drown by Pras &. Mitre A Prove The Flirt By HM. Sutuexiasn THe flirt is, and then the » isn’t. She is the composite of smiles, eves. and unadulterated cussedness, draped in such variegated colors that she resembles an intoxi and is about as hard to catch nt she At me cated rainbov She comes into this world a crying, cooing in has reached the fant, and before putting her hair up, sh the town crying because they can’t coo in her se questered drawing-room pastime in the history of woms key stage she was i palms playfully + smiling from behind a palm-leaf fan, and when the angel Gabriel shall have blown the list mellow note on his golden trumpet, and the saints of the past ages are gathered together to sing a gladsome hosanna to the King, then will some coy maiden peep shyly around her heavenly harp, and wave that eternal Lice handkerchief at the second tenor in the celestial che Right in the middle of a good time she discovers that she is twenty-nine years old, and has the alternative of cither marrying the bald-headed bachelor friend of the family who has always been the goat, or laying in a supply of rouge, rice-powder, hair-dye, corn- plasters, and cats, and teach music and ex- pression until her voice and the door crack simultancously : has half of the boys in Flirting is the oldest In the mon the tops of the cocona ving with coconuts and poorhouse The Real Test Sillicus—Ves, 1 am desperately in love with her. In fact Iam beginning to think I can’t live without her. Cynicus—Why find out? don't you marry her and 3 DON'T BE A USELESS WEAKLING GET RID OF YOUR HANDICAES LIONEL STRONGFORT yrical and Health Sp 1279 Stro stort Institute Newark, N. J. Irritating “It makes her mad every time her hu s his work.” That's queer.” Not soe f. He's a divorce lawyer.” vod ime te buy How so Because ‘em with.” T haven't got any money to buy Deeiitacete fats tae, atric Ratt bec Sa eis ala Send You a Lachnite ws (nde 8. rite Today =e 5 reday 237 ‘teretd Lachman CO. EA alae