Judge — September 20, 1919 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Time to Hush—“ This fellow Demp- sey is the greatest fighter who ever lived.” oftly, my friend, softly.” What's the matter?” “You are being overheard by an 18- year-old boy who lost a leg in the Ar- gonne.”—Birmingham Age-Herald. Pop's Good Work So your father went to the war after all, Freddie?” “Yes, sir.”” “The war must have been nearly over by the time he reached France.”” “Well, he got there just in time to stop it.""—Yonkers Statesman. vaiter,”” “T want French While You Wait— said the discharged doughboy this meal served tout de suite. “I get you, boss,” answered the ebony iter, with a grin. “You ain’t de first ary gent’man dat’s been here, sah.” —Birmingham Age-Herald. It Was Something Else—“ You say he was put in the guard-house for going “over the top’?”” Exactly.” “But I don’t understand.” “It happened in Paris. He climbed over a bar to get at a French mixologist who claimed to know how to make a dry Martini cocktail.” —Birmingham Age-Herald. Why Gompers Fled—Sam Gompers has been telling a New York reporter a good story against himself. “While I was in London,” he said, * met a fellow countryman who greeted me very warmly. I knew his face q well, but for the life of me I couldn't place him, so as a sort of feeler I asked him what he was doing in London. “He looked at me in rather a queer sort of way for a moment, and then he answered that he had important bus ness to transact with the British War Of- Finally I told him, in an apolo- that I couldn’t recall his fice. getic way, name. “Oh, Lam General Pershing,’ h “What did you do then, Sam the reporter. “Do?” replied Gompers, with a cl acteristic smile. “Why, I fled as quickly as I could, for fear I should be foolenough to ask him if he had been in the war.”’-— New York Evening Post. Impeded Conversation Why are you so lat have a word with Mr. Brown?” “So I did, de Save Pattern—“The movies are ed- ucational. From them one may learn deportment.”” “Yes, they scem to have things on a solid basis. Isn't so much kissing of the parlor maid by casual visitors as there was in the old plays.”—Kansas City Journal. Politicians hen why don’t you mix with Kas- Because they know me. but the poor fellow does stutter so.” I thought you said you were only going around the corner 10 London Opinion. How He Changed—Mrs, Flathush She says her husband has changed. He doesn’t sleep in church any more Sun- s, Mrs, Bensonhurst—That’s right. He sleeps at the movies, now.—Vonkers Statesman. Utopia—The visitor to the motion picture studio, watching a tender love scene, was visibly impressed. “And do they really get paid for doing that?” he asked incredulously.—Film Fun. Quite So— Speaking of public life.” “The girl who sells movie tickets from a glass booth occupies a somewhat conspicuous position.” —Louisville Cou- rier-Journal. An Evening Spoiled—“Did you en- joy the photoplay?” “But it is said to be good.” “And it may be, for all I can say. I didn’t know until I got inside the theater that the man I was with was personally acquainted with the star.”— Birmingham Age-Herald. Infinite Revenue—“ I've got a scheme to pay off the country’s war debt.”” “What is it?” “Impose a tax of two cents on every motion picture scenario written.” —Film Fun.