Judge — July 19, 1919 — page 16: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

we by Heawan Pawn JUDGE. President Reuses P. Stricuer, Seerctary Ed J. A. Watpon, Joun A. Stetcurr, Peeetroxs Maxwett, EDITORIALS Trea. Grant E. Hawutton, Art Director Lawroy Mackatt, Managing Editor Rottaver, urer Li Reat rie AIRPLANE E have felt for some time that the fut of the airplane should be taken in hand by some disinterested and nitely settled. Newspapers and maj zines feature writers have the prob- lem all askew, and the too indulgent public is at pres- ent in a sort of seething misery from headlines and illustrations that do little else than catch the eye and muddle the brain If our memory, ‘Tue FUTURE oF got after our reading for the last months, is not at fault, airplanes are to carry first-cla mail at nineteen cents an ounce, transport millionaire suburbanites to and from their offices at $4.00 a mile, make forty minute trips between Broadway and Chi- cago, deliver groceries on time, the Adantic in ten hours, climb Pike's Peak and eliminate the crowded traffic nuisance. Besides all this we seem to recall dimly fifty or sixty other irely worthy projects which enterprising flying companies are going to carry out within the coming twenty-four months It is obvious that the gene reading public can not hor to form concrete ideas out of all this jumble. Even barbers grow confused when they try to enlighten their victims over wha they expect to see before long. It is because of this that we here- by take upon ourselves the task of pointing out, in a few well- chosen words, just what the air- plane industry may be expected to accomplish in the next five years. It must be borne in mind that we have no interest, imme- diate or remote, in airplane enterprise, the only compa which we ever purchased stock having gone quietly out of busi- hess some time ago. c For the next two years air- planes will be used largely for e3 hibition and cross en any puntry) et Gamin 1 Gamin Cc feature n't hee urposes pan eve ¢ ‘Bun 3ULL'S And dey calls her You on the \ir routes will be charted, companies organizd, stock sold, and landing places established on all unsold groups of town lots. Speculation, cerebral and financial, will be rife At the beginning of the third year, restriction and regulation of airplane traffic will set in and state legis- latures will discuss and pass laws that will bear more or less upon the evils that have arisen. The cut-out nui- sance will be attacked and aviators will be required t tests and take out life insurance for their grandmothers. Kansas will abolish aviation and organize a national anti-air-traffic crusade Within five years aerial joy-riding will be compara- tively safe and highly pleasurable, and a definite reac- tion will set in against it. It will be denounced fron the pulpit, the street corners, and the soft drink dives In © Congress will pass a constitutional amend- ment prohibiting aviation. ‘This amendment will be ratified within ninety days by all State legislatures except those of Mineola and Love Field, and we shall all go back to our former unimaginative daily routin Ford cars and profanity. stories pass intelligence JupGLets SPEAKING of jobs for return- ing soldiers, we dothink Albert of Belgium ought to land some- thing better than being a King in. * . * After the fall of Bolshevism in Russia, Lenine and Trotzky can make a living by taking in one another's laundry * * . Said Monroe I's a long time between milians. ‘ . . . To the to Carranza Maxi- beer connoisseur the man whoinvented “nearbeer™ had a mighty poor sense of distance. . * 6 Eyt returned from a tri a lady bull w, nothin 1920 is looking forward to a bumper raisin crop. comicbooks.com