Judge — May 31, 1919 — page 21: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Safety in Flight of suspenders, four calico dresses, $5 cash and 13 baby rattles. Kissed 126 babies. Kindled 14 kitchen fires. Put up 4 stoves. Walked 4,076 miles. Shook hands with talked enough to make, in print, 1,000 vol- His Expenses—This story of the elec- umes. Attended 16 revival meetings, and f a Georgia m who was — was baptized 4 times by immersion, and unty commissioner in the — twice some other way. Contributed $50 tion expenses defeated for recent primaries reaches us by way of — to foreign missions, and made love to the Newark Leader in a dispatch from nine grass widows. Hugged forty-nine old Atlanta, His sworn statement runs maids. Got dog-bit 30 tin “Lost 1,340 hours of sleep thinking defeated.” —Midland (Tex.) Reporter. about the election. Lost two front teeth and a whole lot of hair in a personal en Danger—*“Who are the plain people counter with an opponent. Donated one anyhow?" beef, four shoats and five sheep ‘to a “Well, I wouldn't apply the term to county barbecue. Gave away two pairs the lady voters.”— Pittsburgh Sun. and was Mr. Newlyrich at the Art Exhibit es e, dear . love—home. Will you accompan Mis Musical Missus Sydney Bulletin DARKYISMS Brudder Shinbone’s Ilumination — Ah ain't pussonally ‘quainted wiv dis yar coot remarked Shinbone, “but Ah reckon he ain't nuffin’ mo’ dan a sartin onmentionable insec’ wiv er military trainin’.”"—Boston Transcript. First in the Hearts of His Neighbor- hood—One of the collectors of ashes for the city of Indianapolis was at work in an alley one day recently on the North Side. He was a large negro, and a prop erty-owner stood in the back yard mar veling at the ease with which the man handled large barrels “You're a fine specim: said the admirer of the collector of ashes. “What is your name?” “George Washington is my name, sir,” replied the negro “Let me see,” shes. n of manhood,” replied the property; owner, “it seems to me I’ve heard that name before somewhe “Yes, sir; I guess you have, boss,” re- plied the negro. “i've been collecting ashes in this neighborhood onto seven years now.” —Indianapolis News ° Puc pean = Quite a Spell—“I hes ee eee quite a spell, Aunt Jemima.” “Yes, honey, dey done tuk me to de horsepital and guy me a epidemic inter- section." —Baltimore American. you've had iece? Can't fool me. If that was a masterpiece, they'd have covered it ¢ Péle Méle (Paris). comicbooks.com